Mama and Baby Spider One-Shots(Discontinued)

Spiders will end you

June 8 2019

A/N this one-shot is based off a tumblr post, but I can't find the post right now.

Peter and Natasha sat in the Avengers living room, Peter on his phone, Nat reading a book. Clint jumped down from the vents.
"Hey Uncle Clint, what's up?" Peter asked, looking up from his phone.
"Oh my fricken' gosh!-" Clint started, but was cut off by Steve yelling from the kitchen.
"LANGUAGE!" Clint rolled his eyes, looking at his phone.
"Anywa- Nat listen to me, you aren't listening!" Natasha sighed and looked up from her book.
"Okay, I just read that if all the spiders worked together, they could eat all the humans in a year. Cool, huh?" Clint looked up, only to see the two Spiders looking at each other with a look. Then, they both turned to look at Clint at the same time, with almost identical, blank stares. They slowly started to develop identical creepy smiles.
"Oh sh-rap! I didn't know the kid could be murderous! I shouldn't have told them that!" Clint said, then screamed and ran out of the room. The mother and son's creepy smiles dropped and both let out a quiet chuckle. Then, Tony walked into the room, annoyed that Clint was screaming.
"Why the hell-" "LANGUAGE!" "Was Clint screaming?" Tony asked them, pinching the bridge of his nose. The two spiders put on their creepy smiles again. They tilted their heads to the left at the same time.
"Clint made the mistake of telling us something..." Peter said, unblinking.
"Yes, he told us...." Natasha continued. She glanced at her маленький паук.
"He told us that if all the spiders worked together, we could eat all humans in a year..." The spiders said together, in creepy tones. Tony didn't even know the kid could sound creepy. He was also disturbed by the way the spiders did everything at the same time. Were they possesed? Were they seceretly both being controled by HYDRA? The possibilities were endless. Tony backed out of the living room, his eyes not leaving the two.
"FRIDAY, activate lock-down on the Avengers living room." He said quietly. FRIDAY did  as he said, saying;
"Lock-down activated on the Avengers living room. No one can get in, and the Romanoffs can't get out, Boss." Tony nodded, then turned to the kitchen.
"Why did you put them in lock-down?" Steve asked, pausing from eating, and Bucky pausing from baking.
"They've both gone crazy. Clint, like an idiot, told them that if all the spiders worked together, they could eat all humans in a year." Tony said, then he sighed. FRIDAY played back the security footage. Bucky and Steve say just what Tony said they would.
"Wow, that was stupid of Clint. I didn't know the kid could be murderous, though." Bucky said.
"Don't think Clint thought he could be, either." Steve said. Tony told everyone why the two spiders were in lock-down, and no-one went into the living room(obviously). A few hours later, Pepper went to check to see what they were doing. She saw Nat calmly reading her book, and Peter was looking through his phone, every so often chuckling. Pepper stepped farther into the room, about to ask her question.
"Hey Aunt Pepper!" Peter said, not looking up.
"We only did that because people kept interupting my reading, and Peter's looking at memes. So when Clint showed up and told us that fact, I saw an excuse." Natasha said, also not looking up.
"Thank god! Everyone thought you two lost your minds!" Pepper said, happy about the creepiness being for peace and quiet.
"But, to be fair, we could totally eat all the humans if we wanted to." Peter said, smiling first at his mom, and then at Pepper. Pepper gulped.
"Well, supper's ready, it's pasta. Come out when you want." Pepper said. Natasha and Peter both looked up.
"Pasta!?" They said together, jumping up from the couch. They ran past Pepper and into the kitchen.
"I'm starving!" Peter said, sitting down. Natasha nodded, saying she was, too. They were each handed a plate of pasta, which they immediatly dug into. The team was happy they ate pasta to get rid of hunger, rather than them or other humans.