HOCKEY MESS | Shawn Mendes fan fiction

17. Explanation part 2

I'm still sitting besides the lockers with Shawn beside me.

« Shawn I know you're hurt and you blame Cameron for this. But he didn't killed her. He was drunk too. He didn't mean for it to happen. »

« But it did happen! » he says with a broken voice. He sighs.

« I-I know. I can't forever hold this against him. But it just hurts too much to see him. It brings all those memories back. » He says.

I don't know what to tell him. All I can do is watch this broken boy in front of me. He rest his head on my shoulder and we just stay there in silent. It's peaceful. I think we both need it.

« I'm glad you told me. » I say after a moment.

« Mads, I've wanted to tell you for such a long time. I just didn't know how to get the words out. When you asked me about the guitar that day that you came at my house. I wanted to tell you. I also felt for a very long time guilty about having feelings for you. Because it meant that I was forgetting about Rose. I felt bad. That's why that night at the arcade I didn't kissed you. There was this guilt that followed me. »

« You wanted to kiss me? » I say and and blush. He takes his head of my shoulder.

« Yes. I mean look at you. » He says and smirk. I ignore his smirk and continue.

« Do you still feel guilty? »

« Sometimes. But I try to remember that having feelings for someone else doesn't mean that I forget about Rose. It just mean that I'm trying to be happy again. You know, after her death I was completely lost. I didn't know how to feel good again. A little bit later, one of my friend invited me to play hockey with him. I found a new passion. All my negative energy I put it in that. It really helped me. But I'm still not the same guy than before. It's hard for me to open to people. »

« But you easily opened yourself to me? » I ask confuse.

« Yeah. » he says smiling. He takes my hand.

« You see, that's because you make me feel good. I don't have a problem being myself with you. » I blush at his words. He rubs his thumb on my cheek before kissing me slowly.

« Nobody's ever told me that. » I say shyly.

« Well I'm glad to be the first one. »
We smile and lock eyes.

« Hey kids what are you doing here? » asks a teacher. we quickly stand up.

« Sorry miss. We were just... »

« We were practicing! We're doing a movie for a French project! Our teacher gave us the right to go practice before filming here to not be disturb. » invent Shawn.

« oh really? Can I see what you've been working on? »

« Sure! »I say.

« It's about a new boy that comes at school. Here how it beings! » Says Shawn and sit down next to the lockers as we were earlier. I have to think fast.

« Bonjour garçon! Tu es perdu? » I begin.

« Non! Je suis un nouveau élève! »

« Que fais-tu tout seul? »

« Je n'ai pas d'ami! »

« Okay okay stop it! You can continue practicing! I have to get back to work. » says the teacher annoyed. We nod and wait till she can't hear us anymore and start laughing.

« What was that? We're making a project? » I say laughing at Shawn.

« I can say the same! Bonjour garçon, tu es perdu? What the hell is that? » he says making fun of my French accent.

« Okay okay I know my French isn't good! But at least it's better than yours. »

« What are you saying? My French est parfait! » he says with a fake offended face and a poor French accent. We laugh. It's good to know that we can still have fun together after all of this. We can still be us.

« We still have 15 minutes before the bell rings and we have to go back to class. » he says checking his phone.

« What if we wouldn't have to go back to class? » I ask hesitantly. Did I really suggest this? Me, Maddie. The girl who would die at the thought of arriving late to class was proposing to ditch the entire day?

« Are you sure? »

« Yeah. » I say more confidently. He smile at me and takes my hand.

« Come on then! » He starts running to get out of school, taking me with him.

« Shawn we don't even have our coat! » I say. He stops himself and go back to his locker. He gives me his coat.

« You're good now? »

« Yeah. But you don't have anything! » I say looking at his sweatshirt.

« I'm fine. » he takes back my hand and pull me out of school.

« Where do we go now? »

He smirks at me before heading towards his car.

« I know where to go. » he says and starts the engine.

I'm sitting in my seat and appreciate his coat. It smells like him. I feel good in it. After a 5 minutes ride, he stops the car. I get out and see that we are at a park with an ice.

« Hell no. I'm not going ice skating! I'm so bad at it! And you're playing hockey. You'll be so much better than me! »

« Come on! It's gonna be fun! » he goes to the location place and takes everything we need. We go inside to put our skates. We After go out. We're the only one there of course. Shawn goes on the ice and starts making all sort of tricks. I hesitate to go join him.

« Come! » he says and skates towards me. He gives me his hands and help me get on the ice.

« I'm gonna fall! I can feel it! »

« No you're not. Do you trust me? » he says looking at me in the eyes. I simply nod, completely lost in his eyes. He keeps holding me but starts moving slowly. I'm moving too but not a lot.

« You just have to put one foot after the other. Just like this. » he leaves me to show me how to do it. I do as he says and it works.

« IM DOING IT! SHAWN IM DOING IT! » I say, excited.

« YES BABE! » he says and laugh. Im getting a little bit faster to join him.

« Careful Mads! » he warns me. But it's too late. I go too fast and hit him which cause us both to fall. We are both laying on the ground and laugh. I turn my head to face him. He does too and we stop laughing. He takes me with his arms to put me on top of him. My heart starts racing. I thought he was going to kiss me but instead he just hugs me. He leaves a kiss on my forehead. I can feel his heart beating. I like it.

And we stay like that until we have too cold to stay on the ice.