It All Fell Down | A Marauder's Story

Fifteen

"Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise." - Victor Hugo, Les Misérables

     It was the night after the funeral, and Charlotte Riggs could not sleep. Her tear ducts were empty, and she wanted nothing more than to drift off into a dreamless sleep. But, her body wasn't allowing it.

     She took a deep breath, and it wasn't lost on her how it felt as if there was an ever present weight on her lungs. Charlie shifted her body to the side and could see the the silhouettes of Marlene and Lily in their beds; they had stayed awake waiting for her to fall into a slumber. She felt guilty that they were staying up, so she had faked unconsciousness, knowing they'd finally go to sleep and maybe, she could trick her body along the way. 

     Her stomach twisted uncomfortably as it had since she had received the news. Her mind raced with memories and thoughts and places she didn't want to go. Tears began to sting her eyes, and she threw her covers to the side in frustration. She slipped from between the sheets allowing her bare feet to touch the cold stone flooring. As she stood, she pulled the material of her shirt down, as it had ridden up her torso in her tossing around.

     She looked at her two friends sleeping soundly and almost woke them. Almost. They hadn't been getting much more sleep than she was, as they constantly worried over her and sat with her whenever the tears wouldn't seem to stop. She said a silent thank you to the two girls and exited their dormitory. 

     As she began to descend the stairs, she wasn't quite sure where she was heading, but she ended up in the boys dormitory before she could think about it too much. She was so beyond exhausted, she couldn't feel embarrassed when she ended up beside James Potter's bedside. She tapped his shoulder until he sleepily opened his eyes. 

     He squinted without his glasses into the darkness of the dormitory. "Charlie?"

     "Can I sleep with you tonight?"

     James observed the dark circles that ran deep under her ocean eyes and wondered when the last time she had gotten a decent nights sleep was. He noted the glistening beneath her eyes, and his chest ached at the thought of her crying silently into her pillow. He gave a sad smile and lifted his blankets. It was lost, even upon himself, that he was so concerned with the girl, that he didn't make a joke about them sleeping together.

     Charlie crawled beneath the sheets with him. He hugged her body to his chest in a familiar way, but it wasn't in romantic or sexual– it was him wanting to be there for her, wanting to absorb all of her pain into himself because nobody deserved to go through what she was.  

     Charlie slept through the night for the first time in what felt like ages, and that's how it began. She rotated through the beds of her friends- James then Sirius then Marlene then Lily then Remus then Peter. Night after night, they all took turns taking care of her, dealing with her nightmares in their own ways. Sirius stroked her hair until she would fall back asleep; Lily cried with her; Marlene coached her through deep breaths; Remus whispered to her about better times; Peter would ask her random questions about nothing in particular, forcing her mind to think about something different. 

     "How come she never has nightmares when she sleeps with you?" Sirius demanded after a particularly long night with Charlie. 

     James looked up from his bowl of cereal with a disoriented expression, milk dripping from his lips. "I dunno," he mumbled through his mouthful of food. 

     Sirius glared at his best friend across the Gryffindor table. He made deliberate, deadly eye contact as he poured another cup of coffee. Steam from the hot liquid rose in billows in front of Sirius' grey eyes, and James noticed for the first time the deep purple circles outlining his waterlines.