take a picture of all my flaws

6

Lauren

"So, how is everything?"

One look at Lucy, and everything comes pouring out. It's always been too easy to talk to her. Lauren takes a drag of her cigarette, the smoke blowing out as she sighs. "It pretty much sucks. I'm not any happier. I'm less stressed, but... that'll change when it comes to exam period. I guess I just don't know... if I made the right choice. I wanted to drop off the face of the fucking earth but it feels like I've just been thrown into a fucking giant room full of fans and I can't get out."

Lucy squeezes her hand. "I'm sorry it's not what you wanted it to be. But... there has to be something good, right? A silver lining?"

Lauren bites down on her bottom lip, not sure what to say. There is a silver lining, but even that is surrounded by uncertainty and doubt. "I mean... I've made a friend."

"That's good," Lucy smiles, watching as Lauren taps the ash from the end of her cigarette, "and she makes it a little easier?"

"Yeah, she does," Lauren agrees, taking another drag, "but there's a little... complication. She doesn't know about the show, or that I'm an actress, and I'm worried that if she found out, she'd treat me differently. I like just being Lauren to her. Spending time with her... it's like I'm just normal, and that's all I've wanted. She's just so funny and sweet and beautiful and-"

"And you're totally crushing on her," Lucy finishes for her, and when Lauren goes to deny it, she fixes her with a stern look. "Don't try to deny it. But I'm glad you've got something good out of this."

"Ugh, you're right, I am crushing on her," Lauren sighs, flopping back onto the couch with an exasperated groan. She'd known it for a while; the fact that she'd changed Camila's emoji in her contacts to hearts from the pizza was a big indicator. "I'm such an idiot, crushing on the only friend I've made here."

Lucy shrugs. "You're not an idiot. Unless she's straight."

"No, no, she joked about being gay when we met, and," Lauren pauses to blow out smoke, "and I kind of told her I'm bisexual. She's the first person outside my family I've ever told."

Lucy coughs loudly, "Excuse you..."

"You know you and Vero and Keana are like family to me too, shut up," Lauren shoves her lightly, "I don't know. You're right, though. I really like her. I don't know, I'm not good with women, they're too pretty and it's scary."

Lucy snorts with laughter. "That's a mood. But you're an actress, right? So act like you are good with women, turn on the charm, and get yourself a girlfriend. But, you know, tell her about the show first."

Lauren cringes, exhaling smoke. "I can't tell her about that."

"She deserves honesty," Lucy tells her, and Lauren knows that, but that doesn't make her any less reluctant. "Lo, I mean it. Tell her."

"But I don't wanna," Lauren pouts, and she knows she sounds like a petulant child, but is it so bad to enjoy being treated normally for once? "You tell her."

Lucy holds her phone out. "Give me her number and I will."

Lauren doesn't move an inch, because she has no intention of doing that. "Look, it's not even like I'm keeping anything from her. The information is out there. I've never lied. I've just not mentioned it. If a fan came over to me while I was with her, then she'd know, and it's not like I would say oh, she's just a long lost friend who wanted to take a picture."

(She doesn't tell Lucy about how she'd literally hidden in the bathroom at McDonalds to stop that from happening.)

Lucy just sighs. "I still think you should tell her, but that's your choice. As long as you're not actively lying to her, then I guess it's not so bad. Now come here, let's give the fans some Laucy content."