Forbidden {L.S.}

Sixty-Two

Everyday I waited for Louis to text me. I finally changed my wallpaper after a week, but it's not like I used my phone. Niall was the only important person around at this point, and I lived with him. 

I kept his ring on. I couldn't bring myself to take it off. Niall never said anything, but then again, I couldn't remember if I had told Niall about that or not. As stupid as it was, it was my only hope of Louis and I getting back together. Even if he never came back, I would still have a hope of being able to see him again. I wore long sleeves or hoodies to keep the tattoo hidden until I could relate it to something other than Louis. But it was Louis. All it was was Louis, and I didn't want to change the meaning of it. It was always supposed to be Louis.

We were in school, the second to last week. Everyone was worried about their grades as finals rolled around, and no one was sure what would happen with Louis’ class since we had only had substitutes and it wasn't supposed to change. My guess was that we would get a test based on what we knew and that would be it. That's all he had planned to begin with, but it’s not like I could just tell everyone that without questions popping up as to why I knew what the final was going to be. And I didn't want to bring any more attention to myself. After leaving with him that day, everyone was asking me a ton of questions. Like if I was with him, why I was gone for so long, why we left on the same day. I didn't want to answer. I didn't want to come up with excuses.

I walked into class alone, Niall had to stop at his locker and get something. I was the only student there so far, which made sense since my class before this was just down the hall. I sat down and looked up, my heart stopping when I saw that Louis stood there, in front of the room. I stared at him for a few seconds before I grabbed onto the desk and looked down, squeezing my eyes shut.

I could do this. It was just an hour. I could see Louis for an hour without crying. It wouldn't be that hard. It’s just a class. It’s just a class. I could do this. 

I can't. I can't do this.

I stood back up and took long strides to the door. “Harry,” Louis called, noticing me for the first time, but I ignored him. “Harry,” he said more forcefully. I shook my head without looking back.

Niall was in the hall and gave me a confused look as I walked towards him. “What's going on?”

“Harry,” Louis called again from behind, and Niall's eyes widened when he saw Louis. "Don't just walk out."

I didn't stop walking away. Niall tried to grab my wrist but I pulled it away. I wiped my cheeks and tried to keep myself from crying anymore than I already was, walking further down the hall until neither were visible if I looked back.

He would have texted you to tell you if he wanted you to know before. He didn't. It's over Harry. It's over.

Each thought was a stab to the heart, but I had to remind myself. It was over. I pressed my back to the wall and took deep breaths and holding them until I counted to five, then let it go. “Don't cry. You're okay.”

I'm not okay. I'm so not okay. How can I do this?

“You're okay, Harry,” I whispered as tears fell down. “It's okay. You have to be okay.”

Niall rounded the corner and pulled me to his chest as soon as he saw me. “Fuck, Harry.”

“I'm okay,” I cried. “I'm fine.”

Niall just held on tighter. “Lets go.”

“We have to go to class, we can't-”

Niall shook his head. “Let's fight that battle tomorrow, okay?”

“No, I have to. I have to be okay,” I whispered. “I'm okay. He’s okay, I have to be okay. If I leave it's gonna look weird.”

I closed my eyes and took a breath. Niall mumbled something under his breath I didn’t catch before saying “H, you aren't ready for this. It's okay. It's okay not to be okay.” Niall grabbed my arm. “Come on. It'll be more obvious if you stay and can't even look at him.”

I took in a shaky breath and let him pull me along. When we got to the front doors, the security guard was there, his arms crossed, staring at us. Niall pulled me down the hall without making it look like we were heading to the doors. 

He went out a side door and walked around to the student parking lot, getting in his car. I stared at the school for a second before getting in, my backpack on my lap.

Niall stopped and got us something to eat, but I didn't touch mine. “Why didn't he warn me? Did he think that either of us could have actually handled that?”

“I don't know,” Niall answered. “He's had as much time in the world to prepare to see you, and maybe he expected someone to tell us he was coming back.”

“It hurts, Ni,” I whispered. “I miss him so much.”

Niall glanced at me then back at the road. “I know, Harry. It'll get easier.”

“I would be more than happy if you two ever chose to get married.just know that I would always agree. You’re both angels that were destined to meet."
    “Maybe because we have a feeling it won't be Styles for long, so we're getting our money's worth out of it.”
    “I love you, Hazzy.”
    "I hated every person Louis has dated because they weren't good enough for him. I really like you.”

“You need to eat, Harry,” Niall instructed. “I know you don't want to but you need to.”

I sighed and grabbed the bag. I grabbed a few fries and ate them slowly, looking out the window. Niall sighed but let it go. We got to his house and I went to “my room” which was their guest room. Niall went to talk to his parents and give them some made up reason as to why we were home.

I crawled into bed and closed my eyes, everything that Louis’ family told me rolling around my head. I didn't want to miss him. I wanted to be with him. I hated the fact I was crying in my bed instead of at school, happy that he's back.

Niall came into the room to talk to me, so I closed my eyes. He waited a few seconds, most likely trying to gauge if I was actually asleep or not before he threw the blanket over me then left and closed the door. I opened my eyes for a few seconds before closing them again. I fell asleep with tears drying to my face as my breathing slowly evened back out, Louis being the only thing on my mind.