Broken souls Boyxboy

Chapter 28: The Aftermath

Encircled by roars of crying engine and thunderous tires, Jack and I stood in our own little bubble, the world losing focus around us with each passing second. My arms were clutched around his back as if I were falling and he were my ledge. My mind was still foggy, the atmosphere around us a complete blur as I gave my all to my boy.

He pulled away sweetly, diamond blue eyes gazing up at mine with innocence brimming at his pink waterline.

Having Jack pulled away from me sent a violent wave of reality crashing over my head.

Suddenly the wind felt too cold, the rain was too heavy, the night sky was too dark, the cars were too loud. Jack was too good for me. All these things that had been nebulous in my mind were becoming crystal clear.

Every single reason I had for pushing Jack away all hit me at once, a salvo of guilty bullets piercing my skin.

"I, um I sh-shouldn't have done that. W-we should um go." My throat cleared awkwardly as I turned away from Jack and began pacing back to my mum's car.

Swiftly, I filled the engine back up with the petrol canister I had abandoned by the door and got in, throwing it carelessly behind me to the back seats.

Within no time, we were moving, speeding down the road in the direction of home. Not a word was uttered in the sickening silence, which I was thankful for. I'm not sure I could have stomached a conversation with Jack right now, not with this guilt that was multiplying in my stomach.

I really just kissed Jack. It's almost like I didn't care about the fact that I hurt everyone around me.

Upon arriving home, I jumped out of the car and fled into the house with a quiet and confused Jack trailing along behind. Without even acknowledging my presence, my mum ran over to Jack, asking him repeatedly if he were okay in a freakishly fast tone. Her hands were all over his face, pushing the wet hair away from his forehead.

"I'm okay." He repeated like he was stuck on a loop. Through the barrels of care that got thrown his way, our eyes connected briefly. Although it was only a short second, I could still see the sadness and confusion that roamed his mind.

I left unnoticed by my parents and escaped to my room, letting the door close loudly behind me as I fell onto my bed face first.

What the fuck had I done? I had officially fucked everything.

I laid there, my mind a chaos filled mess, for a while before the door opened and closed, only giving off a minute sound. I twisted my body round so that my back was against my duvet and sat up, fearful to meet Jack's eyes. He was stood there, arms rigid and fingers nervously twitching. He was facing anywhere but my direction. The tense atmosphere was making my stomach twist. I couldn't deal with it.

Impulsively, my body sprang up, legs finding their way onto the group to support my body. "I need to go." My jacket was clutched in my hands and my legs were already heaving my weight through the door before I had even finished my sentence. Thankful that my wallet and phone laid peacefully in my jacket pocket, I called a taxi to drop me off near to where my car had been deserted and in no time was I back in my familiar leather seats of my baby; my car.

I didn't have any plans of what I was going to do whilst I roamed the streets of the town. I just connected my phone to the aux cord and let my playlist sing through the car. The volume was up high, shaking any worries out of my head temporarily.

Time flew by and before I knew it, 2am had struck on my phone. I had been out for hours now, declining the several miss calls from my parents and Jack whilst I sped down empty concrete streets carelessly. So much for never wanting to speed again.