Treat Me Like a Game, and Ill Show You How Its Played

Epilouge: In a Heavenly State of Mind

I'm in Luke's car, the music turned low so it plays as a sort of background music for our drive to the unknown. When he asked me out tonight, I thought we would go to a simple movie or go to the beach not because I would've wanted this to go quickly, but because it was on such short notice that I didn't expect that we would be trapped in a car for more than forty-five minutes.

"Where exactly are we going?" I ask, looking out the side window.

"For the tenth time, I'm not telling you. But, we are almost there." Luke replies with a slight laugh in his voice and I want to glare at him for finding my impatience, amusing.

"Can you at least share how you thought of this?"

"Nope." He shakes his head, looking over at me. His blue eyes seem to be unfocused as they stare at mine- their color a light navy under the night sky and a shine reflecting the stars above. Emotions are swimming inside of them and I have yet to figure out just one of them. I want to uncover all the emotions tonight.

This very night is going to be the day that I unravel that one feeling that has been there for so long. It's a mist that always overcomes the mixtures of blues and greens and blends in with them- making it hard to unmask.

Amazing how one look could unleash so many nerves and feelings inside my stomach and how one look, one smile, one motion, could cloud my thoughts that intrude my brain. How it is so easy to get lost in his eyes or stare at his smile and be amazed at how they both could brighten my mood. To want to remember and play back his voice and how it's the best sound at night- a tone that helps you fall asleep peacefully.

I'm the first to snap out of the trance and I show this by saying, "Luke, eyes on the rode."

"Right. Sorry..." He mutters, clearing his throat. Even if nobody was around and no cars or headlights brightened up the night, I had to say it. I smile at his side and turn forward, watching the empty fields and hills pass by. The moon shines brightly down on us and our car, always by our side- like a tour guide showing us the way.

It's shown us the right way so far, let's just hope we don't get distracted and wander off in another direction like last time. That Luke and I don't start to think that it's showing us two different paths and decide to try them both- me going one way, Luke heading the other- where we get lost and can't find our way back.

But, we've found our way back. And that's what matters.

Actually, Luke found me. I was just to dumb to realize that until a few weeks ago. If he hadn't, I'd still be wondering what had gone wrong at the time and trying to cut him out of my life.

However, you can't cut someone out of your life- you can only live in denial. You can't tear them out of memories like they were never there, and you could never pull a plug in your brain that deletes them in your mind and what they've might've meant to you in the past.

Because the past is set in stone. You can't change it. You can't rewrite it.

You and can only write your future. And right now, mine is filled with Luke and me. My future looks bright and heavenly. Looks peaceful and enjoyable. 

It looks promising.  

And unlike last time- I could actually be sure of it.

I was snapped out of my daze when I heard Luke mutter, "One" As soon as we turned on a dirt path and pass a small hill. "One and a-half" He whispers when we pass a big field and again, mutters, "Two." When we pass another hill, one bigger than the last one.

"Okay, you can count. I'll send an appreciation letter to our kindergarten teacher." I laugh, turning to him with a smile, "Why are you counting?"