Complicated Love

Momma Talks

"So have you guys thought much about names?"

My mom sits across from me on the floor, helping Liam put a puzzle together as we talk.

"Since you used Brad's family for him.  I bet your dad would love it if you used his name."

"Brad really wants John as the middle name, but we haven't thought much about the first name yet.  We're really behind on that this time.  I feel like we're behind on everything.  Moving here so fast didn't help much, everything is such a mess."

"Well you have him to be taking care of this time.  We didn't have a name for you until the week before you were born.  The only thing we had right was the hospital bag in the car."

"I don't even have that... I don't have any plans or anything set up."

"Do you want it to be like him?  Leave as soon as labor starts?"

"I guess it depends on how intense it is.  I don't want to be stuck there forever, but I really don't want a car baby if it's as fast as he was."

She laughs just thinking about it, but can see that I don't find the idea funny at all, that I'm genuinely terrified of it.

"Maybe you should look into a birthing center.  They're supposedly more comfortable if you go in early, that might work out better for you."

"I thought about that, I think that's my best option, but I also liked the idea of staying home for a while too.  Being around my own stuff, just going on with my day, until I can't anymore."

"That's a good idea, but you know how fast it was with Liam, if that happens again it might not be good."

I think about it, knowing she's right, but I've always dreamed of spending time at home and relaxing before going into the hospital.  It would be great to be with Liam, playing until I can't stand it.

"I'm worried about that, I don't want to have him here, especially since there won't be a doctor or anyone.  I just wish I had a way of knowing if it would be the same, or if I have some time."

"It's different every time, I know people who went from 1 hour to 20, it all depends.  You just want to be safe.  I was in labor almost 15 hours with your brother, and then with you it was about 2 hours.  It all depends on the baby."

"I just hope it's fast, but not super crazy fast.  I really enjoyed not hanging out in a hospital room forever."

We play with Liam for a while longer until Brad gets home and we can head out for my latest doctor's appointment.

"Maybe we should have brought him with, he might like this." Brad plays around with some of the equipment as we wait for the doctor "There's all kinds of new toys for him."

"Yeah, plenty for him to destroy.  Put that thing down."

"Hi, Jennifer!" My doctor finally walks in, greeting us "I was able to look over all your records from the LA office, it looks like you've had a healthy pregnancy so far, so I'd like to continue with the same treatment, as long as you're okay with it."

"Yeah, that's great.  Nothing has really changed, so I'd rather not intervene with anything unless we need to."

"Great.  I really don't see a reason to right now, but I'd like to start off today with an ultrasound just to check up on everything."

I lay back on the chair, letting her do everything needed while we watch the screen.  Even though we've already seen him, it's still amazing to have a preview of our baby.

"Looks like baby Pitt is still doing great, did you have any questions or concerns for me?"

"I know it's early to tell, but do you think she'll make it the full 2 months?"

"You haven't shown signs of preterm labor, and you made it full term last time, so right now I'd say you'll definitely make it.  Of course that could change, but we'll definitely keep an eye out for anything concerning."

I get myself situated as we continue talking, loving this new doctor already.

"I'll have you make an appointment for 3 weeks, and if you have any questions or concerns in the mean time just let us know."

"Thank you!"

Brad and I walk out, stopping to make the appointment before deciding to stop for lunch on our way home.

"We came here after filming the other day, the food is great." I slide into the booth across from Brad, picking up my menu "The peanut butter pie was really good."

"How's the commercial going?  You're supposed to be done this week."

"It's good, they said yesterday should have been the last day.  They might have us back tomorrow if they need to."

We order our food and sit across from each other thinking about our changing lives and how to adapt to them.

"So my mom and I were talking this morning... and I think I might have an idea of my birth plan this time."

"Really?  What is it?"

"Well it's not set in stone, but I want to be relaxed this time.  I don't want to really plan it, but I thought the idea of staying home until my water breaks, or my contractions are really close would be nice.  I don't want to be stuck in a hospital, or birthing center for hours.  I'm just torn because I don't want a car baby either."

"I mean, whatever you want to do, but you had him so quickly, we probably shouldn't mess around too much."

"I know, that's what has me torn.  I'm not saying stay home until they're a minute apart, but I don't wanna go to the hospital after only having 2 contractions either."

"Well, we can wait and see.  Nobody knows how it'll go, but we'll do whatever you want to do.  I'm just here for the support."

"Let's just wait and see."