Reject (mxm)

Chapter Fourteen: Ciaran

Ruari slowly opened his eyes and I chuckled when he gasped at the sight of me, like he didn't expect me to actually be there beside him.

I was happy when he asked me to stay. I was intending to anyway but it felt infinitely better when he requested it himself. I wasn't tired so I just watched him sleep and made another exciting discovery.

"Did you know that you talk in your sleep?"

He buried his face on my chest murmuring, "No."

His ears were bright red and I find it adorable that he could blush like that. Seriously. I moved back so I could tilt his head up I wanted to look at his reddened face. 

"Well, you do now." I grinned giving him a kiss.

I intended it to be a quick peck but who cares, Ruari responded eagerly so I'm not going to complain. I kissed my way to his neck and stopped. I lightly brushed its soft length with my fingers, a frown forming on my forehead.

"What?" he asked cautiously.

"They're gone." I said tracing the parts of his neck where the love bites used to be. "I was hoping they'd last longer than a few hours."

He burst out laughing and hit me playfully on the shoulder.

"Well you could just make new ones next time." He smiled broadly catching me off guard.

He leaned closer and captured my lower lip in between his teeth. I growled and turned him over successfully trapping him under me before swooping down for another deep kiss.

"You're right," I breathed out when we came up for air. "I can make lots next time."

I wish he'd let me mark him soon. With the full moon approaching a lot of the unmated wolves will be looking for sexual release. And we won't be exempted because I haven't put my mark on him. I hate to think of him getting caught up in the moment and end up doing it with someone other than me. If we're both marked then we'd only crave each other and the others will stay away knowing we're both taken.

I'm not a saint. I'm not a virgin either. But I haven't been with anyone since I found out I was mated to Ruari. He may have disappeared on me and we may not be properly mated but I remained faithful to him all these years. I don't know how I managed it but it felt wrong touching and kissing someone who isn't him.

I was suddenly attacked with a burning desire to know if he's been with someone else. Then the image of a faceless Jean flashed in my mind.

Shit! If that asshole touched Ruari I'm going to rip him apart with my bare hands!

"You're scowling again," Ruari said placing a finger in between my brows.

I bit my lower lip and shook my head. "It's nothing." I lied.

He did some sort of quick maneuver with his arms and legs and flipped us over before I could blink. He sat astride on top of me pinning me down on the bed. Impressive.

"It is something if you're trying to lie to me!" He growled. Now it was him who's frowning. "What is it?"

"I was just wondering if..." I looked away. I could feel a deep blush coming.

Shit! When was the last time I blush at something?

Damn it! How do you ask someone you love if they've had sex with anyone before or if they've been faithful to you while you're apart? It won't matter anyway as long as from now on he'd just have me. But I need to know. And every fucking time I need to know something everything blows out of proportion and explodes on my face. I don't want Ruari to get mad at me again.

"You're wondering if I ever slept with anyone before," he said flatly.

I looked back at him and nodded.

"Would it matter if I had?" He asked eyeing me closely his face devoid of any trace of emotion.

I could feel my heart beating wildly and I shook my head no.

Ruari leaned down and gently brushed his lips against mine. He took both my hands and placed it on his thighs while his explored my chest and shoulder. He continued to kiss me lightly and I allowed him to, running my hands up and down his thighs. 

"The answer is no." He whispered seductively in my ear as his hips came down over mine. "I'm a twenty-one year old werewolf virgin. You'd have to be very gentle with me for our first time."

He smiled wickedly before getting off me and sauntering to the bathroom. I lay on his bed stunned out of my mind with a raging erection.

He said I have to be gentle for our first time, which means he's willing to mate with me. I turned and buried my face on his pillow. Now that I know for certain that he's giving me second chance my body's burning to be inside him. But I can't rush it, can I? Damn Ruari! He knew his words would affect and he purposely said those words to string me along. I can't decide whether he's punishing me or rewarding me.

I inhaled his scent from the pillows and laughed out loud. I guess I'm in for a lot of surprises from now on because my mate is just too unpredictable. And frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Ruari and I stayed in for the rest of the day. We watched a couple of movies in genres that he liked and some that I enjoyed. We made dinner together and cuddled after we ate.

We talked about various topics and I wasn't surprised to learn that he's knowledgeable and very passionate about certain subjects. For now, I avoided discussing anything regarding the pack or what he's been doing these past five years. I even tried not to ask him about Rothe. I just enjoyed his company, content that he enjoyed mine as well.

I was reluctant to let him go to bed, alone. We shared a couple of kisses all day and have been touchy with each other. I feel like the separation was too much after getting a taste of what I could actually have. But I know we have to take it slow. Get to know each other and be comfortable together before we move on to the next stage.

I went to my office to catch up on some paper work before heading to bed. I took a quick shower and lay on my bed to stare at ceiling. Sleep was eluding me. I could hear Ruari's even breathing from the other room. I wonder if he's already asleep.

This is torture! Lying here, alone, in my big empty bed with my mate just a few feet away on the other side of the wall. I want to hold him damn it!

I groaned turning on my stomach to bury my face on my pillow. His scent is not here, I thought belatedly, its nowhere in this room. I want us to stay in the same room from now on but I think Ruari is not ready for that. I should be thankful he's willing to give me another chance.

I froze when I heard the knob of the adjoining door slowly turn. I lifted my head, trying hard not to fly off the bed and just grab him.

"Ciaran?" Ruari called from the doorway. I couldn't see his face because of the shadows but it doesn't matter. He came.

"Yeah," I answered trying not to sound too excited.

"Can I sleep with you?" He asked and my breath hitched. "I mean, not sleep with you but sleep, there... ah beside you."

I chuckled because I understood what he meant the first time. He sounded nervous like I would turn him away. I stood up from the bed and took his hand to pull him to my room. I kissed his forehead. Honestly, I can't think of doing anything perverted right now. I just want to be with him. And I'm happy he initiated sleeping on the same room and the same bed on his own.

I guided him to the bed and he lay on one side. I crawled behind him covering both of us with the coverlet and blanket. I placed one arm under his head and the other around is waist. In response, Ruari snuggled closer molding his back to my front.

"Night Ciaran," he sighed happily holding the hand that I have resting by his waist.

 I buried my face on the back of his neck and breathed in deeply.

"Goodnight Ruari." I whispered and plunged in to the best sleep I have in years.