My dog is a wonderful dog

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Kaminari: I wonder what it'd be like if I became the class president for a day...

...

*sirens blaring, Koda crying, Aizawa converting his religion so he can go to purgatory or wherever Kaminari won't be, Bakugou swearing he'll be nicer for now on, the walls have collapsed around them*

Kaminari: Oh.

Tenya: I LEFT YOU IN CHARGE FOR ONE DAY--!

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Kirishima: Have you seen my bracelet? I left it here on the table.

Izuku: No, sorry. I'm missing my baggie of quarters. I left it next to your bracelet.

Uraraka: I'm missing my hand mirror.

Izuku: Your hand mirror was just a piece of glass glued to a some cardboard.

Uraraka: Oh yeah.... I'm too poor for an actual mirror!

Tenya: Hm, it seems as though everyone is missing something. Sounds like we have a thief amongst us.

*cuts to Tokoyami sitting next to a small pile of everyone's shiny things*

Aoyama, contently sitting in the middle of the pile: I have been kidnapped.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Enji: Shoto, why don't you love me!?

Shoto: Because no.

Enji: What?

Shoto: No. Fuck you.

*gets on All Might's segway and leaves*

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Nemuri: Bring it in you depressed cow! Hug me!

Aizawa: ....

Aizawa: Can you remove your hand from my ass?

Nemuri: Shh.... This is the only time I will ever be this close to it....

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Eri, pointing up to the night sky: Woah! What's the that constipation!?

Hizashi: I think you mean "constellation" sweetheart...

Eri: No.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Interviewer: So what made you want to become a hero?

Izuku: To beat up my childhood bully.

Bakugou: What...?

Interviewer: What...?

Izuku: What!? Who said that!? That was not very plus ultra of you!

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Katsuki, age 7: Hey mom! I wanna learn sign language! I wanna learn it so bad!

*Later*

Katsuki: *signing "nerd" out*

Izuku, tearing up: Im not sure what that means but Im sure its not nice...

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Fatgum: *starts druming Africa on his belly*

Tamaki: Why are you like this?

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