"Welcome back to Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained, Anomaly #54: The Mailbox." As Dipper points camera at mailbox. "There it is, in the middle of the forest. No house. No address. Today, me and my team of experts...""
Soos Ramirez walks up to the mailbox, "Sup?"
The Doctor waves his hand, stating his presence in this daily adventure. "Hello!"
"...are gonna put a letter in and see who picks it up." Dipper finished.
"My letter posits a salient question: "Sup Dawg?" as Soos puts the first letter in mailbox.
"Now we're gonna hide behind a bush, and wait for someone to come by—"
The mailbox shakes.
Soos backs away, "Oh, Dude!"
"What the?!"
The flag raises.
"Did you see that?!"
Dipper runs over to the mailbox, "Open it!"
"No, you open it, dude! I'm not touching a ghost mailbox!"
"I Got IT!" The Doctor exclaims.
"Okay okay. Here it goes." as the Doctor opens the mailbox and pulls out a letter, "What?!"
"That's not our letter, dude!"
The Doctor opens the letter, "It says..."
Soos grabs the letter and holds it up to the camera, "Hello Doctor, Dipper, and Soos."
"It knows us!"
Soos adds in, "What if this thing's all-knowing?"
The Doctor shrugs, "That's possible!"
"We gotta test it." Dipper adds in.
Soos holds up a letter and puts it in, "What did I shave into my head this morning?"
The flag raises.
Soos takes letter out, "A baby duck holding a paddleball", Dude! It knew!" as he takes off his hat to reveal the duck shaved into his hair.
"What?!"
"Ask it more questions!"
Dipper then writes on paper, "When is the end of the world?".
Dipper receives the new letter, "3012: "A great hero to many will save us all." Huh! We've got a while..."
The Doctor smiles.
Soos asks: "Who is my dream woman?" Reply: a picture of a muscular woman. "Ho ho ho! Hot tamales! I'll save that one for the archives!"
Dipper mutters, "Uh, when is the exact time and date of my death?"
"That's up to fate to decide," The Doctor adds.
Soos shouts aloud, "Did aliens build the pyramids?!"
The Doctor scoffs, "Sure!"
"Or... what is the meaning of life?"
"We already have our meaning..." The Doctor muses.
"What are marshmallows made of?!"
"...Old sugary recipe!" The Doctor playfully comments. "No-seriously; it's made from clouds..."
Dipper then asks which almost stuns the Doctor. "Or... Who wrote Journal #3?!"
"Who wrote the journal! Who wrote the journal!" Soos adds in.
"We're finally gonna get the answer to the greatest mystery in Gravity Falls!"
The Doctor flinches, "Uh-oh..."
Mabel Pines comes up, "Nifty! A mailbox! I've been wanting to mail Mom this video of me sticking 100 gummy worms up my nose!"
"No, wait!"
"Dude!"
"Slam!"
"That's even not good at all..." The Doctor stated.
The flag raises.
Dipper takes out a letter. "Your gummy worm video has disturbed and insulted me. You fools are unworthy of my great knowledge. The era of human enlightenment shall never come to pass."
The Doctor scoffs, "Well-that's unfortunate."
The mailbox glows.
"What's that?!"
Dipper and Mabel runs away, "AAAHH!"
"EVERYONE-OUT!" The Doctor shouts.
The mailbox implodes. Static. Dipper, Mabel, and Soos are standing in the middle of a scorched clearing. The Doctor's bow-tie was smoking with cinder.
"Well, uh, that concludes Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained, where we learned when dealing with the unknown-DO NOT MAIL VIDEOS OF YOU SHOVING GUMMY WORMS UP YOUR NOSE!"
Mabel pulls out gummy worms, "There's more where that came from! Into my nose! INTO MY NOSE!"
"No! No! Show over! SHOW OVER—!"
"Yep, that's enough for a day!" The Doctor adds in.
"8-5-12-16 13-5 5-19-3-1-16-5 15-18 2-5 4-5-19-20-18-15-25-5-4." 9 23-1-19 19-15 2-12-9-14-4...
16.19: 20-8-5 7-21-25 15-14 20-8-5 15-20-8-5-18 5-14-4 15-6 20-8-5 13-1-9-12-2-15-24 9-19 19-21-18-5 1 18-5-1-12 2-12-1-2-2-5-18-13-15-21-20-8!
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Who Falls Shorts
FanfictionAlso posted on Fanfiction. Net: Who Falls shorts' version. (REWRITE COMPLETE) All rights belong to their creators-I do not own Doctor Who or Gravity Falls.
