Who Falls Shorts

Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained: Lefty

"Alright, uh. Welcome back to Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained. Today we investigate Gravity Falls Anomaly #82..."

He pans over to the left-facing man.

"This guy. Sure he looks normal, but if he's so normal explain why he's always facing left. Literally I've been following him around for weeks...and I've never once seen the right side of his face...and neither has anyone else. But why?"

"Mabel? Theories?"

Mabel Pines holds up pictures, "Theory one: He's hiding an embarassing sunburn. Theory two: Half-man, half lizard-man! And theory number three, my personal favorite: He's normal! And Dipper's just crazy!"

"That's not a theory, that doesn't count as a theory!"

Mabel laughs, the Doctor shown too, relaxing on a bench. "...Maybe try not to be too paranoid while entering into the world of pain, no firearms allowed Goodman!...Meanwhile, you gotta love bowling!"

"We find out now! Hello, good sir!" as Dipper approached the strange man.

"Eh, I'm sorry, cameras aren't allowed in here."

"Oh, it's not on. Not on. He bought it! So, would you mind grabbing those bowling shoes for me? The ones on your right side?"

"Those ones?" Dipper nods and Lefty puts them on the counter without turning around.

"Whoops! Oh no, I... dropped my wallet! It's over to your right there. Your right side. Could you maybe turn around and..."

The strange left-sided man sighs and picks up wallet without turning around. "There you are, sir."

"Fine... Could you just get me my bowling ball?"

"I don't see why not."

Dipper follows him with camera.

"Let's see, looks like maybe it's in here..."

"Well, I was thinking it could be the..." As the man turns around and reveals the robot side. "Ah ha! What the...?!"

The other side of the strange man turns out to be a robot, monitored by mini-fish-like aliens, "Guys!"

Both Dipper and Mabel were stunned by this revelation.

The Doctor quickly runs over.

"We're blown, shut it down! Shut it down! The time has come!"

"The time has come, brother!"

"I can't! I have a family!"

"You signed the oath!"

The Doctor then reassures them, "Gentlemen! Gentlemen! Your secrets is safe with us! No need for rash actions, next time-do not scavenge "Mr. Poolcheck's" clockwork droid body on the road! Kids, I'll take care of this, in the meantime-"

He points at the fire sprinklers with his screwdriver which turns them on.

"Aw, come on!"

"The sprinklers are on!"

"EVERYONE OUT!"

Dipper runs away, along with Mabel. "Well, that concludes anomaly #82. Uh, I think we might want to burn this tape...or give it to the Doctor..."

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