Finding Emily

{Chapter 8}

  There was a memorial service. The police attended as they said that sometimes criminals showed up at these kinds of things. The thought made Becca nervous. She kept looking around for a moment and tried to see if anyone was particularly sketchy looking, but Steven told her to stop being ridiculous. She shouldn't be playing detective. 

  It was also the first time she had seen any of her friends since Emily's body was found. They had tried to see her, but she'd been too devastated to see or talk to anyone. She still wasn't sure about seeing anyone, but there they were. She knew they wanted to pay their respects. 

  Star was in a black dress with red stars, Quinn was in a stylish gray paint suit, Jenna was in a simple black dress that Becca recognized as her prom dress from last year, Tasha was the pant suit she wore to prom as well, and the boys were all in formal suits. Becca was surprised to see Kyle wearing one. He never wore suits; not even to prom or homecoming. He occasionally wore a nice jacket over a t-shirt, but that was as far as it went. He was looking around, and Becca knew he was looking for her. Well, they probably all were, and for a second she wanted to run again. She didn't want to see any of them or hear their grief. It all felt like too much. It made it seem even more real.

  "Becs," Star said when she spotted her best friend and ran over to her. "I've been calling you over and over again – oh God."

  "I know," Becca said as she hid her face in her friend's shoulder; she smelled like cotton candy and cheap perfume as she always did.

   "I can't believe this," Star cried. "I mean, we expected it because she had been gone so long but-"

  They hoped it would end differently like with the Elizabeth Smart case. Everyone kept bringing up that case when someone would start to express doubt about Emily being found alive. It was so rare though Becca thought. She knew in a way they were lucky though. Sometimes they never found the body. Families were stuck wondering and never knowing. Which was worse?

  Emily was still in the medical examiner's office. They said it could be a few weeks before they could bury her. Becca didn't know which she disliked more; the thought of Emily being alone in that cold room with all the other dead people, or in the ground. Both made her feel like throwing up. They decided to have a public memorial as they couldn't have the funeral yet.

  None of her friends knew what to say, but they tried. They were all in shock. They lost Emily too. Kyle didn't say anything. He just hugged Becca and stroked her back. She felt like she was a million miles away from him now though. She wanted to cling to him and have him tell her he wasn't going anywhere, but he couldn't. He wouldn't. He took Star's hand, and they walked into the church together. Becca followed on the arms of Lenny and Quinn while Tasha, Jenna and Brian walked behind them.

  "It was a beautiful service," was the phrase of choice after it was all done. Family told stories. Most of them were funny ones. People tried to lighten the mood, but they couldn't. It was too sad. It was too scary. Emily was murdered. No words were going to cure that.

  "It was a beautiful baby girl," Delcan said. "She was born at the hospital at two in the morning, and Becca got her wish for a little sister. She'd only brought it up every day since she learned to talk. I had three amazing kids. I had it all. I never realized how lucky I was at night when they were all safely in their rooms and tucked in. Now we'll never know that feeling again."

  "I should have fought harder," Becca said to Lenny as they hid in the back alley as there was too much press out front. Ever since Emily had been found the media coverage exploded. Becca hadn't thought it could get any worse, but they'd proven her wrong. The whole country was talking about the story.