Heartbeats in Moonlight

Chapter 69

It took her two years to get used to the previous charade, but this currently charade intensified every second. Control spiralled into chaos in her heart and head.

David turned, braced his forearms on the guardrail. "You know, this reminds me of our first conversation, at that rugby camp."

Ella straightened up. She looked directly at David and she quirked an eyebrow at him. "Really?" What was going here, she wondered. Why was he being kind to her? She remembered her first conversation, how hard he had worked to get her trust. To take her from reticent and awkward to confident and happy. She frowned at him, moved away from the guardrail and adding, "How exactly?"

"Yeah. Really." He turned around, his back to the horizon, facing her. "We made small talk." Ella nodded. "We talked about the weather." Yes, true, Ella thought silently. David carried on, "The state of the paddock!" Ella smiled in acknowledgement. He really worked hard to get her trust that day. "You were not exactly worried, but you were in controlled, especially when it came to personal information about you." He cocked his head as he question, "Do you remember our conversation the next day?"

She shrugged. Obviously this ferry trip was going to be a show and tell session and she was not sure this was a good idea. Going back to that time, she would ended up in tears!  

David looked at Ella, his eyes watched her carefully. "I teased you for ages."

"Yes. I know."

David continued, " I remember your cheeks were flushed with colour." And she looked lovely back then and now.

Her cheeks were flushed now, and she hoped, today she could blame the wind for the colour in her cheeks. "Yes. You know you flirted with me." She murmured, flicked a sideways look at David.

He chuckled. "Yes. True." He looked over at Ella, "And you reciprocated."

She nodded. Worry took over. She knew for a fact, she wasn't over him. Her eyes closed for a second as she tried to hold her feelings at bay. She did not want to review this, not now, or anytime at all. That time eroded her composure and left her with insecurity. Not their conversation, not their behaviour, just the fall out from it. She could probably write a book about how to loose your self-confidence.

She'd spent the last two years avoiding him. It should have become easy. But she knew she had spent time avoiding thinking about him. How can she have so many things that reminded her of him, given their brief time together?

"Thank goodness!" He said and Ella missed his grin. "But then, our conversation changed. It felt different. Essential. Important. Amazing. Really significant" He became serious, his voice lowered, his eyes focussed on Ella.

Ella inhaled. He was right.

She remembered their conversation back then, and he was right. Their conversation had changed. Not sure when exactly, but something happened between them, back then. Like a button that was switched on. She remembered a thought she had back then: would she always be feeling the same way about him, given her heart couldn't stop hammering.  And she knew, given the last two years, that she had her answer to that question: Yes, she had the same feeling. Despite the fact they avoided each other for the last two years.

She'd spent the last two years avoiding him. It should have become easy. How can she have so many things that reminded her of him, given their brief time together?

"Not just flirting. It was more than that. We just talked, about nothing serious. But it felt like we were born as soul mates."

Ella understood that. She remembered that feeling. And she still has that feeling.

David wished he could see her thoughts, but she had obviously lifted her drawbridge. She was back to her position: She was behind her wall. "That we really knew each other. That we were meant to be together. You understood me. I thought I understood you."

True, she thought silently. She knew that. Even now.

"Out time together was magical." He leaned back against the guardrail, and met her eyes. He reminded himself that he had gone home that evening after he had met her, smiling without knowing why? He reminded himself that he had gone back the next day, hoping to see Ella and was pleased when he saw her. He remembered going through the drills, followed the instructions, replied to requests, asked questions, but at the back of his mind, his focus was on Ella. She remained on his periphery.

Her tongue ran over her lips. And she dropped her eyelids.

He said quietly, "I didn't know anything about you, your family, anything really, but it felt like I knew you. Really knew you. It felt as if my heart recognised you as my mate. Did you feel the same?"

Ella remained frozen to the spot. How she was going to cope with this? She wasn't expecting David to be honest about their history. She shrugged.

Straightened up, "Come on, Gabriella. Be honest. You knew me."

She raised her head, met his glance and nodded gently. "Yes." They stared at each other. "It was a long time ago." She said quietly as she released a heartfelt sigh. It didn't feel like it was a long time. It felt as if they just had that experience. He gave her time to regroup. And it gave him time to review his position.

"Despite not knowing anything of any real significance." This review also reminded David that this was the only time he had felt like this, this understanding without really knowing the person. "I just knew. I understood you and you understood me." And as he remembered that fact, he knew he should have remembered that when his mates had spouted that rubbish about her character. Even when she reminded him about his friends, when he was at her office, he had ignored his gut feelings about her. But standing here, in the middle of the Cook Strait, he knew that his gut feeling about her had not changed. Why did it take him so long to accept that he had made a poor decision?

Ella conceded without intending to reveal quite so much she said, "I know." It felt as if a door had been wrenched open. "But a lot of time has passed." She murmured.

"That is not true." He countered.

"David..."

"I mean, yeah, I agree, time has passed in terms of hours, minutes, even years, but actually, it doesn't feel like that." He looked over at her. "Even now, the way we talked, just a few seconds ago, also those two hours at your office before we changed the topic to the incident, it was like the way it was back then. Honest. Candid. Direct. Open." He squared his shoulders. "Even now, whenever you lower your guard, we are back to where we were."

"I am not sure about that." She sounded far from convinced, "But..."

"The last two years," He rubbed a hand across his mouth, as he prepared to address the elephant in the room, "I avoided you. I guess, for the same reason, you avoided me."

She raised her eyebrow.

"We were cautious." He said quietly.

"I am really sorry that I was taken in my teammates' version." His apology was sincere.

Ella shrugged and looked away. 

"I am really sorry, Gabriella."

Then she glanced over at David. "You barely knew me, back then."

"I knew you." He corrected firmly. Even after that shambles he knew her. "And I should have corrected them."

David flicked Ella a quick look and got an answering nod. "Probably." Their eyes met and locked. "Henry, like your mates, thought they were standing up for their friends." She said quietly and shifted so that she faced the front. Her eyes smarted with unshed tears. 

David also turned around. 

They waited.

David repeated his apology, "I am really sorry, Gabriella."

"Me too."

Seconds passed.

"So, now what?" David questioned.

She replied with a shrug, "Why would we do anything, now?"

David frowned as he realised that the elephant in the room was going to be ignored again. A huge hurdle. They will have to rehashing that shambles.