Today was just another day in Valhalla, over at Blue Base, Wash was currently on lookout while Tucker and Caboose were having a conversation. And on the Red Base, Simmons was trying to repair the warthog when all of a sudden, Grif was sprinting towards him
Grif: SIIIMMMMOOOONNSSS!!!!!!!
Simmons stands up as he suddenly heard Grif calling out his name in desperation
Simmons: what the-?! Grif?! What's wrong?!
Grif: oh Simmons!! You have to help me!! You've gotta save me!!
Simmons: save you?! From what?!
Grif: from Vermont!! Who the fuck else?!!
Simmons: Vermont's after you again?! Wait...you didn't try to fill his toothpaste with jelly again did you?
Grif: no...in fact I didn't pull any pranks on him at all! But he's given me a very cruel punishment for whatever I did!
Simmons: what is it? Did he force you to pet a wild animal? Did he force you to jump over lava?! What did he do?!
Grif: he...he...he's got me running laps!
Simmons: .........Yeah well you need the exercise
Grif: WHAT?!! Simmons!! Don't you know what this means?!
Simmons: that you'll finally have a better body structure and you won't be lazy anymore?
Grif: oh come on Simmons! You don't know how hard it is to make my stomach talk like a mouth!
Simmons: ugh!! I did not need to know that...
Grif: but this is an absolute crisis!! If I keep this up I'm going to have some kind of heart attack!
Simmons: and that's pretty much what you get for being lazy dumbass. You're body's just not used to this much exercise
Grif: NOR SHOULD IT EVER BE!!!!!
Vermont: HEY!!!!
Both Simmons and Grif look at the top of Red Base to see Vermont, with his helmet repaired, looking at them
Vermont: DID I SAY YOU CAN STOP GRIF?!!! GET YOUR FUCKING FATASS MOVING!!!!!
Grif: YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!! YOU'RE NOT MY COMMANDING OFFICER!!!!!
Vermont then gives Grif a warning shot from his rifle just near Grif's right foot
Grif: Ahh!! Holy shit!!
Vermont: YOU WANNA TRY THAT AGAIN?!!!!
Grif: OK OK I'LL KEEP GOING YOU FUCKING DICK!!!!
Grif then continues jogging around Valhalla as Vermont steps onto ground level and approaches Simmons
Vermont: how're the repairs coming Simmons?
Simmons: great so far! I've even been able to make two jeeps! It's gotten a lot more difficult without Lopez though
Vermont: you'll do fine
Simmons: hey if you don't mind me asking...where's Sarge?
Vermont: he's with Foxtrot, currently trying to repair the radio
Simmons: oh ok! Uh...aren't you being a little hard on Grif?
Vermont: after the shit he's been giving me...he kinda deserves it
Simmons: well I know, and he certainly needs to exercise but...it feels like you're taking things a little too far
Vermont: I'm not taking things too far, I'm only doing what needs to be done...now if you'll excuse me, I need to go speak to Wash
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Red vs Blue: Agent Vermont
FanfictionAgent Vermont was never a people person, but that didn't stop him from making friends. Agent Vermont was a quiet, cold, short tempered and dark man, but that was all because of his past. he had trust issues and never fully agreed with the director...