Fear Me

Alone and unwanted

Thursday January 30th 2039 (Katrina age 18)

I miss having someone to care about me. I felt protected and not alone. When I am with myself it never works out, last time...

Flashback January 30th 2035 (Katrina age 15)

"I am sorry if I wronged you. I am sorry if I wasn't good enough. I am sure you don't understand."

"I don't know what you are talking about mum. I love you. You have done nothing wrong."

"I lied to you sweetie." she collapsed Ito my arms. Unable to hold her own weightless, lifeless, breathless.

"No mum you can't die. You have to come back," I screamed at her shaking her violently and trembling, falling deeper and deeper into myself. I curled up, afraid of myself. The day at school hadn't gone too well...

My father's lanky figure immerged from the sidewalk; his long tan jeans and red checked shirt open at the front causing his chest to be exposed. He pushed the door open gently and took off his worn brown boots before placing them on the shoe rack. I shook with fright as he paced down the hallway calling my name. He entered looking down at my mother for several seconds before turning to me and looking into my eyes. His green eyes looked at me with pure hatred as if they could rip through my soul.

"Di-id you.." he stuttered, his fists clenching at his side.

I quietly spoke "No she came in like this she just collapsed and there was nothing I could do about it"

"Can you go up to your room now please?" He whispered solemnly I ran up the stairs and crouched in the corner, crying. My mother had always cared about me. With my father being famous, I never saw him and he was always out.

"Katrina come down please" he shouted making me shake harder as I slowly came down the stairs tripping on the last step causing me to fall down to the dusty wooden floor. I expected my father to catch me but he stepped back out of the way glaring down.
"Get Out... get out of this house and don't come back" What dad no! He can't do this. I thought he loved me!
"Don't you love me anymore?" "Get out! Now" he screamed grabbing me by the shoulders and carrying me outside. He dumped me on the front grass and threw my rucksack at me before slamming the door shut. "I sat there unsure of what had happened before I grabbed my back and ran, never to look back.

Flashback ends
I cried, upset with myself, upset with my mother, upset with my father. forever alone, forever unwanted...