Y/F/N= Your full name
Luke:
"Luke Hemmings’ girlfriend Y/F/N passed away this afternoon, the source of her passing not yet being relinquished," the E! network anchor women says.
"Change the channel," Mikey whispers.
"No," I shake my head. "It’s okay."
"Luke, you should go be with your family, mate," Ashton whispers, scooting closer to me and wrapping an arm around my shoulder.
"I can’t," I say, breathing in through my teeth. "You guys are my family, anyways."
"Do you want to talk about it?" Calum asks.
I look at my lap and close my eyes, pictures of my beautiful girlfriend flashing before me. I look back up at the wall, the tears finally making an appearance.
"Oh my god," I moan in agony, the fact that y/n is gone setting in. "Oh my god."
"Shhh," Ashton says, pulling me in for a hug. The other two join the hug, and we all just sit in silence for a minute or two as I sob.
"I can’t believe she’s gone," I say quietly. "God, I love her so much."
"It’s gonna be okay," Calum offers. There’s tears flowing down all their cheeks.
"I miss her already. I don’t think it will ever be okay," I whisper. We all just sit there in one another’s embrace, needing each other more than ever.
Michael:
I sit on the couch in silence, the news of y/n’s passing taking all the composure I had.
She was healthy, strong, perfectly fine. She didn’t die fighting. She died because of a stupid ass drunk driver.
He took her life in an instant. That’s what one beer can do to you, eh mate?
"Mikey?" mum calls, walking up the stairs to the living room. "Michael?"
She opens the door and looks at me sadly, telling me it’s okay to show my emotions, that I don’t need to act punk rock right now.
"Mum," I sob, closing my eyes and allowing the fucking tears to pour down my face in a steady stream.
"Oh, my love," she says, sitting down and wrapping her arms around me.
"The bastard had no right," I mutter. "He had no fucking right. And now my y/n is dead. She’s gone."
"Michael," she sighs quietly through tears, looking for things to say. I shake my head.
"Can we just be quiet?" I ask.
She nods her head and we sit in silence, thinking of the beautiful women the world just lost.
Calum:
"Calum, over here!"
"Calum, c’mon man! Smile for the camera!"
"Stop moping and give us a picture worth a headline!"
"Do you people not have the decency to understand that this is a fucking cemetery? My god," I say, climbing into my car and closing the door, blocking the paparazzi’s view of me.
I put the car into drive and pull out of the cemetery, the sun setting slowly as I make my way back to the empty house. The house that lost it’s warmth and happiness the day she left me.
The day she left the world.
"God," I pound my fist on the steering wheel, causing the car to swerve into the other lane.
The cars around me honk in a chorus of frustration.
"Sorry," I say, knowing they can’t hear me, before pulling over to the side of the road.
I close my eyes as the tears finally fall from my eyes.
"Why?" I sob. "Why did you have to leave? What am I going to do without you?
"You were my everything. You always will be, I promise.
"I’ll never forget how you smiled when you blushed, or how your lips naturally curled when you were focused. Or how you loved me more than anyone.
"How I loved you more than breathing."
I sniffle and lay my head back.
"I miss you, y/n. Come home."
Ashton:
"I just need a moment," I say quietly, and the funeral attendees walk back down the path, out to the main area of the cemetery.
y/n’s parents and I agreed that y/n would’ve wanted to be buried back in the wooded area of the cemetery, where it’s quiet and peaceful. Where the wind weaves through the trees, where the leaves fall each autumn. Where there’s stone paths leading to each headstone so you don’t have to step in the moss, and simply to make it prettier.
I don’t give a shit.
I sit down in the moss in from of the freshly dug grave that my beautiful fiancee rests in.
"Hey," I mumble, shuffling some dirt around with my feet. "Everyone had really nice things to say at the service, especially your mum."
I sniffle lightly and choke back the tears trying to brim over onto my cheeks.
"I went up to say something, but uh… I choked up. I really hope you aren’t disappointed in me.
"I tried, baby. I really did. But losing you… y/n, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. Am going through. Will ever go through."
I let out the sob in the back of my throat, a strand of my slicked back curls coming loose with the shaking of my body.
"I wasn’t ready," I cry. "I said I was because I wanted you to do what you felt was better for yourself, but…
"God, I miss you. Sleeping alone at night. I guess the dogs are there but it’s not the same… they’re confused, I think… they don’t know what’s happened. They don’t understand. I guess I don’t either, really.
"You kept telling me, before you left… you kept telling me to find someone else when I’m ready, but y/n… I’ll never be ready. You were it for me."
I run my hands over my face to rid myself of the tears and inhale sharply.
"You were it for me."
