the blue passion flower ~TaeJin~

Petunia

Acception. It is one of the hardest levels for self evolution. It was a while that Seokjin accepted everything happened to him. He accepted that Taehyung will never enter his life again. It was a sad but happy matter. Seokjin was sad because he was in love with the younger boy, he was happy because he didn't want to hurt himself. It was the matter of time. He could say he was getting better. He wasn't feeling used by Taehyung anymore. Sometimes even he thought Taehyung was only a hallucination which never happened in reality. However the sting pain in his heart always reminded him that Taehyung really entered his life, wrecked it and got out.
Seokjin entered the Narcissus shop, only to meet Jungkook cuddled up with Namjoon. It was a long time since he last saw Namjoon. When the couple noticed him they became flushed. Seokjin smiled, they were the cutest couple ever. Namjoon was helping Jungkook to be mature while Jungkook was giving chance for Namjoon to be immature. It was adorable. He greeted with the couple softly. Even if his life was a mess he was glad Jungkook finally met his favourite author, even built a good relationship with him. He offered them chamomile tea, so the three were sat behind the counter.

"Hyung" Namjoon called him. It was really sweet someone as wise as Namjoon to call him hyung. He responded only with a bright smile.

"I know you may not want to talk about it, but I think you need to know" Namjoon said. Seokjin could guess this must be about Taehyung. He nodded, if Namjoon wants to talk Seokjin wouldn't stop him.

"I know him since he was in kindergarten. I was first grade. Taehyung's family newly moved in our area that time. We got close and we became friends. He was happy, adventurous and he had an enjoying spirit. He found out his sexuality in highschool, he was sixteen and came out to his parents at seventeen. His family didn't showed any special reaction. They didn't opened their arms to him nor they backlashed him. Taehyung was still so modest, so even after it he couldn't get in a relationship. He was designing clothes to famous Park Bogum. Taehyung was new in fashion industry and having this huge project with Bogumssi made him to work harder. In their outfit preview sessions they got closer. Bogum knew how to enter Taehyung's heart. The modest Taehyung accepted his entry wholeheartedly. They soon dated. You had to see them hyung. They were so in love. Taehyung adored Bogum most. They made lots of memories. After seven years! Seven years together all the time! Bogum and Taehyung got into fight. Not that it was their first fight but it was huge is enough for Bogum to leave their home. Bogum drove fast in slippery winter roads. He crashed the car and died. Taehyung was wrecked and desperate. First months he didn't talked to anyone. He had turned into a ghost. I met with Jimin first in order to get some help. Thanks to him Taehyung started to live his normal life even if he was grieving inside." Namjoon paused and took a look at Seokjin. Seokjin was concerned.

"Even if he was passing the worst state of his life doesn't mean can hurt someone who is trying to help" Jungkook said furiously.

"I know Kookie" Namjoon said curtly before looking back at Seokjin. It was obvious Namjoon was waiting for a reaction before resuming his words. But what Seokjin could say? How could he react? Taehyung suffered alot. Anyone in his place would have mental issues.

"I understand him Namjoonah. It's not easy to get over of a trauma like that" Seokjin stated earned a soft smile from Namjoon.

"How can you understand him? It doesn't matter how he is suffering, he shouldn't hurt others emotions to grieve for that Bogum guy" Jungkook said with red ears and big eyes. Seokjin loved Jungkook's protective side.

"Not everyone can know how to grieve Jungkookie" Seokjin said calmly, smiled brightly toward younger to vanish the anger away.

"How can you talk like that when it's you who he hurt? How can you act like you're happiest even if he shattered your pride?" Jungkook said. His words hit Seokjin hard. Taehyung shattered him into pieces but still it couldn't prevent Seokjin from loving and caring for Taehyung.

"He felt different toward you hyung. I remember how he talked excitedly about the flower shop owner. He was like eighteen years old. You made him feel alive again. I could see Taehyung's eyes on you. He was looking up to you. He admired you, he still does. It's not that his intentions were to hurt you, but he did because you were replacing a place which was only filled with Bogum." Namjoon said. Seokjin gave a sad smile to them. If he was alone, he would definitely cry!

"How... how is he?" Seokjin asked with a cracked voice. He tried to soothe Taehyung, but Taehyung was too broken. Taehyung was looking up at him. Seokjin could see those puppy eyes following every movements of Seokjin. Taehyung hurt him so much, Seokjin was hurt so much. It didn't matter how Taehyung felt different toward Seokjin  at the end he will keep comparing Seokjin with a dead person. Taehyung must know how to stop comparing a memory with a reality.

"Why you're asking how is he? He hurt you hyung!" Jungkook snapped. Seokjin must talk with Jungkook privately! He must not be mad at someone broken like Taehyung.

"How is he?" Seokjin asked one more time.

"I really want to lie to you hyung. I really want to lie and say he is fine. But he is not. He was broken when Bogum died but now he is fazed. He is not okay at all. He lost Bogum and when he found someone who can soothe him he lost him too. He is hassling but he is not complaining. He knows it's his fault" Namjoon said. Seokjin really wanted to cry out loud. Namjoon's honesty killed Seokjin. He wanted to hear that Taehyung is so happy and he is not effected. However it would be painful for Seokjin but still he couldn't reach out Taehyung when he needed. He couldn't soothe the pain Taehyung was suffering. He stood up went toward the flowers. Next to Petunias. He touched their petals before grabbing the whole posy of petunia flowers. He carried them to outside and put it in the trash.

"What are you doing hyung?" Jungkook asked.

"I don't want to have any signs of anger in my shop Kookah" Seokjin answered.

"Anger?" Namjoon asked behind.

"Petunias represent resentment and anger. I don't want them in my shop" Seokjin answered while looking at Jungkook.
Sometimes there was no need for words. Actions were loud and effective. Jungkook must know the message behind this action because he looked down and uttered a sorry.

"No matter how people are inexperienced and puisne you can't brought up resentment which would burn you first" Seokjin said. Jungkook nodded. Seokjin approached him and Ruffled his hair. Jungkook was Seokjin's younger brother and Seokjin would do anything to keep his heart white, without hatred.

"I can see why Jungkook and Taehyung both looks up to you" Namjoon stated with a thoughtful smile.

"It's hard to be up, Namjoonie. Sometimes you wish noone sees you up." Seokjin said. Namjoon nodded.

"When people look up to you, you don't want to give a chance to your flaws to be noticed in your face. You feel alone, cause you don't want people to see your flaws, failures and imperfections" Seokjin said. He was amazed how he had gotten extrovert newly.

"Your manner makes people to look up to you hyung. No matter how much imperfect I still look up to you" Namjoon said. Seokjin was amazed more. Namjoon was looking up at him too?

"Don't forget hyung. We all see you up, it's not because you're perfect or full fledged. It's because you're still perfect with your flaws and scars" Namjoon said. Seokjin hugged him, he was grateful for having such amazing friends.

"A friend is one who overlooks your broken fence and admires the flowers in your garden." Seokjin thought before offering the cute couple a homemade lunch.

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Hi everyone, here comes a new chapter. I really loved this chapter, we got to know Taehyung more. Besides I loved the final quote, it really reminded me of a special friend who is my main supporter.
This chapter's song is interlude: shadow. Namjin's conversation was mostly got inspired by this song. ☺🎧

What do you think about Taehyung? His actions are a bit complicated. What do you think about Jungkook's anger? What about Namjin's friendship?
I really love reading and replying to your comments, it's really giving me alot energy.

Purple you all and never buy Petunia for others💜💜💜💜💜💜💜