Forgetting My First Real Kiss

Chapter Two

Chapter Two

"So totoo pala talaga ang sinasabi nila? Na kapag magaling sa Math, bobo sa English?" I asked Nico, smirking at him. Nandito kami ngayon sa condo unit ni Nico. Nagpapatulong siya para sa English subject niya.

He looked over his shoulder and pouted. "Huwag mo na ngang ipangalandakan. Umpisahan mo na lang magturo." He scratched his head then went back searching for his notes on his study table. Kakasimula pa lang ng classes and he already has a lot of studying to do.

"Fine," I said, chuckling. Ang cute niya mapikon. "Ilabas mo na yung book at notes mo." I ordered him as I took my notes and book. I sprawled on my stomach in his bed and watched him muttering under his breath.

What's wrong with him? Parang hindi lang yung studies niya ang pino-problema niya.

"You want me kiss your bad mood away?" I blurted out. Shit. Did I just offer him a kiss?

I looked at him and he looked stunned too. And then his eyes went to my lips. "You... uhh... want to kiss... me...?" he stuttered.

I guess, this is the right time to give my first real kiss. I love him and he loves me. Ano pa bang gusto ko? At isa pa, this might be the only way to erase the feel of someone else's lips on mine. Makakalimutan ko na rin siya nang tuluyan.

I cleared my throat and looked at him nervously. "I think I'm ready, Nico."

He stood up from his study chair and walked closer to his bed. I sat up as I watched him getting closer. Umupo siya sa harapan ko and looked straight into my eyes. "Are you sure?"

I nodded.

"I love you, you know that?"

I nodded again.

He breathed in deeply before closing his eyes. I met him halfway as he leaned in. I closed my eyes when our lips touched.

Suddenly, the memory of Nico confessing his feelings for me flashed in my mind.

It was after our practice for our ballroom dance in our PE 2 subject. No one knows except, of course, us, that we're dating. Well, hindi siya dating talaga sa pagkakaalala ko pero parang ganon? But its more like the 'hanging out' kind of thing.

Magkaka-text kami, kakain sa labas, manunuod ng sine, tatambay sa Lover's Lane ng school, magkukulitan at kung anu-ano pa. Minsan, naiinis ako sa set up namin noon dahil wala akong pinanghahawakan. I hated the part na pinipigilan ko yung sarili kong mag-assume na may gusto siya sa akin noon dahil masakit ma-disappoint na umaasa ka pala sa wala. I've been there and done. I wasn't going to do that again.

Paanong hindi ka mag-aassume? Mas makulit at mas clingy pa siya sa text convos naming kay sa kay... wait, let's not go there.

Si Nico yung tipo ng lalaki na, "Kumain ka na ba?", "May kasama ka ba ngayon?", "May kasabay ka ba pauwi?" and the likes. Hindi man lahat ng firsts ko ay siya ang nakakuha, may mga simpleng firsts ako na siya ang nakakuha.

And you know what I love about Nico the most? He repaired my heart even though that time, we both know it was beyond repair.

Alam ko ang clichéd but he was the one who invested all of his time fixing me, making me laugh, making me happy and he brought out the best in me. He repaired my heart and it immediately opened up for him.

"Hanggang kalian ba nating dapat itago itong..." Napahinto ako nang huminto siya. "Itong namamagitan sa atin?" he asked, frustration etched on his face.

Bakit nga ba namin kailangang itago? Ano bang mawawala kapag ipinagsigawan naming gusto namin ang isat isa?

Meron kasi kaming blockmate na gustung-gusto siya. Natatakot akong may masaktan kami. Pero mukhang nauubusan na ng pasensya si Nico dahil mas pinipili kong i-spare ang feelings ng ibang tao kaysa sa kanya.

"One of these days, Daph, ipagsisigawan ko na talaga sa harap nila na mahal kita," he said under his breath but I still heard it.

"Mahal mo na talaga ako?" I whispered in surprised. This is the first time that he told me he loves me.

"Yes, Daphne. I love you," he said, his eyes sincere.

But even though I know I was half in love with him, I didn't say it back. A certain guy was still occupying the other half of my heart and I just can't seem to get him off there.

***

"Daphne, ano ba?!" sita ni Nico. Napapitlag ako nang pitikin niya ako sa no.

Tinignan ko siya nang masama. "Ano na naman?" tanong ko bago ko ibinalik ang atensyon ko sa sinasagutan kong problem sa calculus homework ko.

"I'm sorry. Bigla ka kasing tumahimik. I thought you're shutting me out again." I felt Nico's arms wrapped around my waist. "Please tell me what's bothering you."

I looked at his face and I can see that he's genuinely concerned. "It's about my parents," pagpapalusot ko bago umiwas ng tingin.

"You know you can trust me," he said.

I sighed and closed my eyes.

Could I tell him what happened years ago and what happened yesterday? Could I trust him with my family problems?

Without giving myself too much time to think, I decided to tell him everything. Well, not everything. Just the things that happened after that.

Nico just sat beside me, offering his shoulder for me to lean on. He listened quietly, not saying anything to interrupt me. He even kissed my forehead when I finished talking. "I love you," he said, his lips brushing against my hair.

"I love you, too."

Masaya ka na ba, Daphne? Nico is now your first real kiss. Hindi mo na kailangang isipin pa si Lourd. Si Nico ang nandito, mahal ka niya at hindi ka niya iiwan. Hinding-hindi ka niya tatratuhin na para kang basura. Mahal ka niya at pinatunayan at pinatutunayan niya pa rin ito.

You can forget about the guy who got your first kiss.

And continue to love the guy who gave you your first real kiss.