"Ano ba talagang nangyari Evan! Kagagaling lang ni Siera kaninang umaga dito! At ngayon nandito na naman siya!"
Nagising ako dahil sa ingay ng aking paligid. Nagmulat ako ng mata and my eyes darted to the man I was reaching out for days. Napatingin ako sa kanya. His eyes on the floor. Parang pinapagalitan na bata ang itsura niya ngayon. I missed him but I still remember how he coldly stare at me in his office. Kaya nga ako nasaktan.
My baby!
"C-ciarra." I weakly called Ciarra's name to catch their attention hindi naman ako nabigo. Agad lumapit sa akin si Ciarra. Pinilit kong umupo kahit na nanghihina parin ako.
"My baby?" Naiiyak na tanong ko dito. Napatingin ako kay Evan, his face is blank. Nag iwas ako ng tingin sa kanya noong magkatitigan kaming dalawa. Pakiramdam ko hindi ko na siya kayang tignan pa ng matagal dahil pakiramdam ko pinipiga ang dibdib ko habang nakikita ko siya. Nasasaktan ako. Ciarra sigh and hugged me.
"Your baby is okay Siera." She said. "The doctor said your baby is okay." She said na ikinaiyak ko. "Kaya taha na beshi! Wag ka ng umiyak, maiistress ka na naman niyan." Sabi niya and she tries to cheer me up.
Akala ko iniwan na ako ng baby ko. Akala ko hindi na niya ako pinakinggan at hindi na siya kumapit eh. I was so terrified when I saw the blood dripping from my thighs. I thought I will lose my baby.
Napatingin na naman ako kay Evan. I stop myself from crying. Napansin ni Ciarra yun.
"Uhm. Maiwan ko muna kayong dalawa. Bibili lang ako ng pagkain at maiinom." And she excuse herself. Tututol pa sana ako pero nakalabas na siya. Wala akong nagawa kundi ang mapabuntong hininga. Evan step toward me and he seated at the chair beside the hospital bed. Hindi ko tinignan. I am mad at him. Pakiramdam ko ayaw ko muna siyang makita, ayaw ko muna siyang makausap.
"Siera..." Tawag niya sa akin and he hold my hand but I took it away. Ayaw ko din siyang mahawakan. Masamang masama ang loob ko sa kanya. I am also hurting bigtime because of him.
And a long silence took over us. I heard him sigh. Nanatili akong nakatingin sa may bintana. I don't really want to see him.
"Siera, please." He pleaded but I played deaf. "Please let's talk." He pleaded again. I nearly laugh sarcastically at him and now he is the one who is pleading to talk. Anong ginawa niya sa akin sa isang buwan? I texted him, I chatted him and leave a voice message to him repeatedly asking and pleading him that we should talk but he ignored me and now he is the one who is pleading. Nakakatawa diba. Natiis niya ako ng mahigit isang buwan.
"Siera..." He again called my name.
"Siera..." And he touch my hand. Marahas na lumingon ako sa kanya.
"Don't touch me!" I shrieked. Tinignan ko din siya ng masama. Im mad at him. And I am starting to hate him. Kita ko ang pagkagulat sa mukha niya at pagdaan ng sakit sa kanyang mga mata. Napaluha na naman ako.
He gulp and his browse creased. Umawang din ang kanyang labi. He looked guilty. But I don't need that. I need his explanation but his explanation won't work right at this moment kung saan masyado pa akong emosyonal. Kaya kung maari lang ayaw ko muna siyang makausap. Not now that Im too hurt.
"Bruha..." He weakly said his voice even cracked but I just look at him coldly.
"Siera Im sorry I didn't know." He said, marahas kong pinahid ang luha ko. Is he trying to make me laugh? I laugh sarcastically. Then I suddenly stop at tinignan ko siya ng masama. Matagal hanggang sa napaluha na naman ako , I really cant stare at him that long dahil umuukilkil sa utak ko ang mga nangyari.
He cut me out in his life. Then suddenly the announcement of his marriage. The fact that he is making out with his fiance na akala ko ay arrange marriage lang ang lahat, but I guess it is not just like that. And then lastly, I am blaming him. I can't help myself but to blame him for nearly losing our child. Hindi ko maiwasan dahil nasaktan niya ako. That is one of the reason why I can't stare at him. Why I don't want to see him. Dahil iyon ang pumapapasok sa utak ko. I am blaming him
