Last One Fighting ~ Negan Fanfic

60

Hi everyone! So this chapter is not super long, but it gets a little rough for our beloved Jo. I hope you enjoy they update!

Happy Reading!

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Jo
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It felt like I was drowning. Not like I was being emotionally smothered, but literally drowning. There were whole days when I would spend every minute gasping for breath, my body crippled and unable to adapt to this world I was stuck living in. It should have been my reaction to that cell so long ago. I never should have made it this long. Maybe if I had died in that cell she would still be alive. Merle could have kept her alive.

I didn't know what day it was, or what time. If it had been days or months since my sister died. It didn't really matter. She was gone now, and somehow, in spite of myself I was still here. It didn't make sense. I had watched my entire family die. I lost count of the loved ones I had watched ripped apart in front of me. Katie was the last, and the one I had to put down myself. I didn't understand what I had done to deserve this.

I blinked stupidly and was almost surprised to realize I was sitting outside again. The hard metal grate of the fire escape dug into my skin through the thin leggings I wore. I wondered when I had moved out here. Had it been this morning? Last night? I glanced around. It was daytime, but that didn't tell me much. I rotated between my hiding places. I was under no illusions of what I was doing. Hiding.

I was alone. Which was exactly how I wanted it. It was easier to hide from the world when someone wasn't staring you in the face. For so long after Negan had stayed close by. He wouldn't leave me alone, as though his very presence would keep me from falling apart. As though I wasn't already broken. He would speak to me but I could never remember the words. It was too much effort to piece them together. I'm sure it was supposed to be soothing in some way. I only really remembered the one time he had yelled at me. He grabbed my arm and dragged me to my feet and shook me, like he could somehow just shake me out of this. Like I was in some kind of funk that he could cure. Like he could just fix me the way he did everyone else in this place by turning my weakness into a strength. But what if I didn't want to be fixed.

And I didn't have a weakness anymore. I had failed to protect my weakness. I did this. It was all my fault. I buried my face in my hands, but I couldn't cry anymore. The tears had dried up a long time ago.

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Negan
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I was losing her. There was no way around it, I couldn't pretend anymore. It had been three weeks since The Satellite Station. Three weeks since Kate. If anything Jo was becoming more distant, getting worse, not better. She never left the damn cat walk, never came to our room. I hadn't seen her eat or drink. I knew she must move around at some point but I hadn't seen it. She didn't speak, didn't move, didn't even acknowledge my presence when I went out to check on her.

I gave up trying to move her back inside if I found her sleeping. The couple times I tried she woke up screaming. Not fighting me, just screaming like a wounded animal. I couldn't stand it.

I gave up having Dwight watch her. There was so much going on and she was stuck. I didn't know how to help her. I had tried being gentle and understanding. I tried yelling at her and trying to shake her out of it. Nothing worked. I was at a total loss on how to help her and it was driving me slowly insane.

I loved Jo. She had been so incredibly strong. The ultimate survivor. She didn't know how to stop fighting to the point she was a danger to herself and those around her. She had survived things no one should ever have been exposed to and come out the other side stronger and more capable than anyone else I had met in this world. A true Queen to my King.