2moons The pain (Forth x Phana)

-17-

-17- Forth was laying there, shocked at how calm Pha had left the room, like nothing happened... like he didn't care at all. It hurt like hell, but Forth wouldn't back down at just this, or would he? The Engineer wasn't so sure himself anymore. What if Pha really didn't like him back and would never? The smaller seemed unfaced after all... Little did he know, how much he messed up Pha on the inside.

The second the door had closed; the doctors stone face fell and even if he would never admit it, Pha was blushing madly. Never had he guessed that Forth liked him and that honestly!? But no matter what Pha didn't like him! The Man was Crazy after all, he couldn't like Forth back! Crazy. Yeah people use this word to describe Forth a lot. The Engineer, enjoyed hurting others, enjoyed hurting and manipulating but this was common sense! The man was a monster and No, no matter how much Pha remembered how Forth had been when they first meet, he wouldn't like him!

...

These thoughts killed Pha inside for days on end. He didn't know how and why he was really considering things with the Engineer, but he was. At night the doctor couldn't sleep, at lunch he couldn't eat or talk to his friends, in classes he couldn't concentrate and when he saw Forth... oh god when he saw Forth, Pha ran like a scared little girl! To say he was embarrassed by his own actions was an understatement, but it was how it was.

The most embarrassing thing for Pha was probably still the fact that he caught himself day dreaming about the other a few times by now. Dreaming about spending time with Forth, holding hands and doing all that cringy couple bullshit, every person not in love found overly disgusting... To that came the million thoughts about the other when he wasn't in dream land.
Only one though brought Pha's brain to smoke. Why was Forth how he was? Back when the two meet he was still different and that wasn't just a game of Forth. He was so much more honest back then. Not so aggressive and venomous. Witch brought Pha to a final thought, it was just an act... an act to protect himself form what ever and maybe, just maybe if Pha would try he and Forth could both change for the better... become more open, even if just to the other.