flowers at sea -lukadrien

-16- i need some rest

"Through all those restless nights,
The starry lights,
All shining onto you.
You are my everything,
My entire being,
Is dedicated to you.

Listen to my silent pleas,
Hear me sing
Our bodies as a whole.
Don't say a word,
Just hold me close,
As I melt into your soul."

The tip lead of my mechanical pencil snapped suddenly, I picked up my guitar, writing down the chords.

These lyrics just come flowing into my mind, I can't even look at him with a straight face at this point, there's no use in concealing it.

Knowing that his sexuality just made me fall harder for him, it was like he was meant to be mine, only mine.

I can't think of him without blushing, those beautiful green eyes, his cute smile, his soft fluffy hair, I just want him to be by my side, I really do.

Putting my feelings into words, into song lyrics. When other people hear my song, will they weep? Will they feel what I felt in the lyrics itself? Most importantly, will Adrien hear it? Will he understand?

It's been a week since we've uploaded the video, they didn't state when the results will come back, I wish I'll be sooner. If we get in, I can see him more frequently, I'm addicted to Adrien Agreste, he's a drug I can't get rid of, no-- love is the real drug.

Will I end up like Marinette? Getting rejected, getting hurt. I can't imagine the pain she's going through, will I have the same fate? I really need to stop freaking out.

I swiped through my laptop screen lazily to put my thoughts aside, another notification popped up on screen, I pressed it without thinking.

'Stars in the night sky' performer proposal, results..press more'

I stumbled out of bed, I had forgotten I signed the application using my email, I slammed the door wide open.

"Juleka! The results is back!" I shouted excitingly, clutching my laptop in my fist, storming down the corridor.

I set the laptop on the dining table, flipping it open, Juleka ran beside me from the toilet, "Really?! Open it!"

My finger moved the mouse, the curser slowly closing to the blue 'press more' button.

I hesitated, "Don't you think we should open this together as a band? I feel kinda bad to do this without them."

"True," Juleka picked up her phone, "I'll call them over now."

After a while, Ivan and Rose came in our apartment, Adrien couldn't make it, but at least he could manage a video call.

With Juleka and Ivan sitting beside me with Rose standing behind holding the virtual Adrien.

"Ready?" I breathed.

Rose nodded biting her fingernail anxiously, "Press it."

"Yeah, do it." called Ivan.

Adrien said some muffled words through the glitching screen I couldn't make out.

I reached for the mouse once more, moving it to the button, and I clicked it.

"Thank you for participating in the audition," I read aloud, "Our deepest apologies but..."

My voice faltered as I read.

"What's wrong?" Rose asked from behind me squinting at the screen.

I was so sure we'll get in that disappointment overwhelmed me, "W-we didn't get in." I stammered, blinking as if it'll undo the words.

There was silence.

"It's okay," Juleka assured softly, "We just did it for the experience anyways."

I shook my head, "That's not the point, we did not get in."

"That's not our fault," Adrien said calmly from the phone speaker, "We always have next time."

"Yeah," Rose sighed, "it's a pity but we can join next year."

"For you guys, yeah," I shuddered, "There's no next year for me, I won't be able to join next year."

"Luka," Juleka placed her hand on my shoulder, "Maybe it's for the best we didn't get in, we weren't prepared anyways."

"That does not cut it!" I shouted unintentionally, fater seeing their stunned reaction, memories of the day I had delusions flashed into my mind, I sighed shakily, "Sorry guys, I-I just need some rest."

I stood up and walked to my room, I could feel a bunch of worried eyes looking at me as I left, closing the door shut.