He was sleeping with his wrists facing up. He had scars all the way from the elbow to the wrist.
I threw myself on the floor, crying and kicking the door frame. Punching the walls. After a while, my knuckles began to bleed. I stood up. Tear stains on my face. The sight of Brian was devastating.
His face still red from crying, scars, tangled hair. He was a mess.
"How did I not notice that!?" I thought.
My eyes hurt.
Brian was sweating. I knew why. A nightmare.
He woke up with a scream. His eyes were wide open and his lips trembling.
"Roger!?" He screamed.
I ran to him. He pulled my arm and I fell next to him.
"Brian, I'm here, its ok!" I said, hugging him by the waist. He cried, his hands to his face.
I was sick of seeing him suffer. Every night, every time I see him, he's either crying or has the saddest face in the world. It has been a month.
My eyes filled with stinging tears.
"Bri, we have to do something about this. I can't watch you suffer like this anymore. Its very nice to see you smile but that barely ever see that amazing part of you. Please, we gotta do something, I beg," I said.
His tears seemed to fade away. He smiled.
"I can't... I can't help it. I would, but I can't." He said. His fake smile was killing me.
I ran my fingers across his face, then cupping it. I pulled him towards me and kissed his nose.
"We'll make it through babe. I promise," I whispered. He seemed to melt a bit.
"I'm hoping, but its useless..." He whispered.
Tears stung my eyes. He began to sob.
"I think we need some sleep. Come here," I said as I pulled him up to his pillow. He went along and lay down.
I lay next to him, as I put my arm around him.
He smiled and hugged me like a teddy. I giggled and fell asleep.
***
We woke up in the same position. I felt Brian'd breath against my neck. I stroked his hand with my thumb.
I felt him plant a kiss on my neck. It felt so great that I softly moaned and looked at him. A smile crept along his face.
His long fingers stroked my hair.
"Morning Bri. You feeling better," I whispered.
"Yes, a lot better," he smiled.
We spent all morning in bed, just looking at each other and kissing. His eyes were shining with happiness.
He was suddenly all full of life and love. It melted heart.
