Rounded Love

Chen

Xiao Chen hated this. He hated how utterly dependent and desperate that he had become when it came to the other boy. Lu Feng had destroyed him over and over and over again and what did he do? Ran right back towards him. Though, perhaps that was a simple matter. It was more worry over what would come in the future. As much as he was not enjoying the fact that he had been kidnapped, what could he really do? He had to deal with this as much as he may hate it. It was simply a part of life at the moment, and he had to handle it with as much grace and poise as he could. Though he had to admit, that Lu Feng was not exactly the person that he wanted to see right now, he was the only person which Xiao Chen had. Even if his mind knew what was logical, he emotions were very much the opposite. No matter how much he tried to scale them back. He felt...helpless. He always had with Lu Feng though, so that most certainly is not very surprising. He just wanted to figure out what he was supposed to do.

Hate as he may, he knew that Lu Feng was going to try something, he just did not know what it was at this moment. He knew that the other would, though, and he was well aware that he had to be incredibly careful with how he acted around the older male. He was surprised that he had even gotten away with grasping the other without permission, and he cursed himself for daring to do such things. He needed to be careful with what he did, and his emotions were causing him such ruckus that he could not really thing. He was running off of instinct. Not exactly a good things, if he recalled what had often happened in the past when things like this happened to him. It was always an incredibly messy business, and he was actually worried that something may, or may not, happen which was far beyond his measly control.

Not that any of this was actually within his control, he was shifting and tossing and turning as though he were on a sailboat. He could do nothing about his current predicament, and he hated it. If he were honest with himself, there was a strange part of him that felt relieved that he was with Lu Feng. Sure, he had been kidnapped, he had been forced from his family, from the people that cared for him, but at the same time he was somewhat safe. He understood Lu Feng and he knew how the handle the other. When it came to anyone else...Yes, Xiao Chen must count himself lucky, even if he did not really feel it.

He was incredibly nervous though. He had no way to know what it was that the Lu Feng was going to do. Since he had no way to really figure that out, he was stuck guessing. Guesses, they had never really been his strong suit. He hated uncertainty, but when he was with Lu Feng all that he was ever given was sheer uncertainty and worry that he would do something wrong. Still, he supposed that was better than what he could be given. 

Xiao Chen tried to sit up from where he had been placed by Lu Feng, but he found that he was far too weak for that, and ended up falling backwards...hard. A g roan of pain exited his throat. He was utterly exhausted and this had not done any good to aid him in the sheer level of pain which he had been feeling for the last...several minutes. He sighed heavily, tears stinging his eyes as he began to realize that there was really no escaping this. He was stuck here, and he would be incapable of doing anything but go with whatever it was the Lu Feng wished of him.

Fear coursed through his body rapidly as he began to realize just the weight of his situation. He was trapped. He was trapped and not only that, he was in a country which he did not know anyone, nor the language, and the only person who would likely be able to communicate with him was the one that he wished desperately to get away from. He had no way to contact anyone, Lu Feng would have taken away all of his electronics, no doubt. Furthermore, nobody was really expecting him to have any type of contact for at least another six months, when his internship was finished. This was something that made him even more jittery. He was not really certain that he could handle his Lu Feng....the character of the person before him was not a safe one. He was utterly screwed. 

His body began to tremble deeply as he realized that he was well and truly trapped. He had no one, and nothing, and it scared him. He had Lu Feng...but Xiao Chen quickly silenced that frame of thought. He did not have Lu Feng. He had a monster on his side, until Xiao Chen did something which annoyed the monster, and he hurt him again, only far more deeply than he had done before. Xiao Chen knew full well that he could not rely on Lu Feng...

But then why was it Lu Feng that he wished to return? Why was it Lu Feng that his body called out for when he had been trapped in undying pleasure, and fear, and yet unable to do anything but sit and take it as though he were some robot? Why was it Lu Feng which he desperately hoped for rather than someone else. He was going insane, he knew it. Otherwise why else would he so desperately wish for the one who had done nothing but mentally manipulate him to his own schemes?

And even more cursed, why was his heart and body so relieved when it was Lu Feng which opened the door and walked through it? His mind and emotions were at war with each other at the moment. Mentally, fully aware that Lu Feng is a horrible person who will only hurt him over and over and over again never stopping until he is satisfied with the torture which he had placed Xiao Chen through, and yet...his emotions were so out of wire that he felt such great relief and joy at knowing Lu Feng was here. 

He was officially crazy.