My Life Would Suck Without You

Court Date

"Wow, man. This is just like Law and Order", exclaimed Luke as he followed Jai and Ariana into the courtroom. "Just look at all that cherry paneling. I bet this room alone cost more th..."

"Luke!", Dianna hissed at her husband as she came up behind him. "You promised you'd behave."

"Sorry." He dipped his soft curls in submission, seeking her begrudging forgiveness.

"Just sit down", she said to him and then, to Jai and Ariana, added, "There's Miley", nodding to the smartly dressed brunette at the counselor's table. "Ariana will sit with her. Jai, you sit with Luke. It'll look better if she's there alone."

Ariana turned around and gave Jai a quick peck on the cheek. "I'll be fine", she assured him when he gave her that concerned look with which she'd become so familiar.

Miley and Ariana were quietly discussing some last minute details when Miley glanced up, looking behind Ariana, and her face went gray. "Oh ... my ... God", she whispered in an unintentional Valley-girl accent.

Ariana turned around and the first thing she noticed were a pair of five-inch spiked heels, from the newest line of Christian Louboutin in his trademark flesh-colored leather. They made Ariana want to sigh aloud in envy until she followed the shoes up the long, white legs to which they were attached and saw a short navy wool skirt, matching blazer, white blouse with a plunging neckline which bordered on slutty and finally the long, blonde hair of ... Ivy Michaels. Ariana knew she had changed her name back to Michaels as part of the divorce decree. Ivy nodded slightly to Miley, completely ignored Ariana and ushered Doreen to her seat at the counselor's table.

Before Ariana could lean over to ask Miley what was going on, Jai was there between them, asking that exact question.

"Why's she here? Ivy works for a Wall Street firm that specializes in creating barely-legal off-shore corporations, not EEOC complaints."

"No idea, Jai", Miley told him. "All of my correspondence has been with an attorney named David Webber, but I'll find out."

The judge entered and a hush fell over the courtroom as a very recognizable, distinguished blonde woman took her place at the bench.

"All rise for the Honorable Hillary Rodham Clinton!", rang the call to attention to all in the courtroom. Ariana's eyebrows rose and she turned to look back at Dianna who just shrugged in response to Ariana's silent inquiry. Connections, thought Ariana. That explained how they got on the court's docket so quickly.

The entire country was surprised when three years earlier, former First Lady, former Senator, former presidential candidate, and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton ran for the bar and became a sitting judge for New York's fifth district.

"Good afternoon, counselors", Judge Clinton said in a dismissive tone as she addressed the two attorneys standing behind the two long counsel tables which faced the judge's bench. She opened a folder and adjusted her half-moon reading glasses. "Now I've read the complaint and ..."

"May it please the court?", started Miley respectfully. "We request a sidebar before proceedings begin."

There were murmured rumblings heard through the courtroom.

"Order...", the judge warned. "Unusual, but granted. Both attorneys, please approach the bar."

The two attorneys quickly approached the judge's bench and Miley wasted no time in coming to her point. "Your Honor, we weren't informed of the change in counsel representation and feel that this particular attorney may let her personal prejudices cloud her judgment. My client is ... involved with Ms. Michael's ex-husband."