They will tell you that sacrifice is a privilege so you will spend your nights praying for god to strike you dead.
They don't understand what it means to be both drowning and suffocating all at once.
To have the wine fill your lungs,
You will vomit on their pews and bleed on their steps.
They want you to believe that pain is a way of life and suffering is a gift that you are given,
So that you will keep wrapping your wounds like presents.
They will tell you to confess and when you do they will burn you at the stake.
There is no winning when it comes to sin,
There is no winning when you can't change for them,
There is no winning when who you are is wrong.
One day you will escape this,
You put more faith into it than any verse you have sung in the church.
"I am not a slave to the altar"
You repeat it over and over again.
But every time you are forced on your knees you lose a bit of hope.
In ten years they will ask you why you don't go near holy ground.
They do not understand that the church makes you burn from the inside out.
Some things you just won't shake:
Like the way the room closes in on you when someone mentions jesus,
You have tasted his blood more times than you can count and all it tasted like was poison.
Some days you will awake sweating with the devil's hand on your shoulder and you will get the sick desire to repent.
Some days you will cry out to god and beg for him to save you.
How do erase years of teaching?
How do you forget that every second is one closer to your eternal suffering?
Maybe you don't believe in god and maybe you never did but the way the cross digs its way into your flesh reminds you of how deranged religion can make people.
This is what it means to be godless.
YOU ARE READING
The Boy That Never Forgot Their Name
PoetryStep into the life of a mystery in this poetry collection exploring romance, death,pain, and creatures out of this realm. Forget what you have learned of heartbreak and ghosts because when you walk into the forest I promise that you will know the tr...
