Empty Handed

Changes (Chapter Twenty-Six)

Songs of the Chapter:
Problem Child - Little Big Town

MATT
The day finally came. I was announced as the new member of the Olympic team (I like "new dark horse flagship US skater" better haha). Chris, on the other hand, was made an alternate which obviously left a bitter taste in his mouth (if I'm to go by his facial expression when the information was passed that morning).
I walked towards him, determined to talk to him.

"What? You came to rub it in?", he spat.

"I'm sorry, Chris. I didn't come to rub anything in. You see, skating is the only thing I have. That's why I keep trying to improve myself and make the best use of opportunities that I- "

"What the fuck are you saying? You know what? Just leave me alone, you 'opportunist'!" He cried and went towards the rest room.

I don't even know what I was saying. Honestly, now that I think of it, I sounded very conceited, selfish and self-absorbed. I needed to apologise. I went to the rest room to find him.

When I got there, I saw him with a piece of glass from the now-broken mirror. As I walked towards him, he slit his wrist.

"What? No!" I ran to him and held him before he fell. Blood was oozing freely from his wrist.

He tried to push me away but he was too weak and tired. I could tell.

"HELP! HELP ME!!" I screamed. I took my shirt off and wrapped it around his wrist. I tried to lift him but he was too heavy to carry.

No one came, so I ran out and screamed for help again while calling 911. Everyone came running to me. Coach Seth pulled me to him

"What happened? What's wrong?"

"Chris! Bathroom!" I was gasping desperately for air at this point. I gave him my phone to speak with the E.M.S. official.

They arrived in just under 5 minutes and whisked him away.

A chill ran down my spine as I watched him getting carried into the van. I couldn't help but feel guilty. This probably wouldn't have happened if I didn't take his spot.

●●●

I went to the hospital where he was being treated and sat in the waiting room for some information. I didn't know how cold I was until someone put a jacket over my shoulders. It was Scott. I gave him a teary smile.

"I got word that someone's having a bad day. So, Santa decided to show up."

I got up and hugged him. Then, I started sobbing while he patted my back.

"I - feel - so - baaad", my voice broke.

"Shhh... it's okay. Nothing's your fault."

He took a sit and positioned my head on his lap. I fell asleep in seconds.

●●●

It was late at night when I woke up. Scott was running his hands through my hair and I was in a foetal position (thanks to the small space on the sofa). The doctors had done a blood transfusion on Chris and he was resting. His father was just leaving the hospital after checking on him. I went to his room to see him.

"Hi Chris"

"Hey."

"I am so sorry, Chris. I really am."

"Be quiet. I have something to say."

"Thank you, Matt."

"Thank you? I don't understand" I really did not get it.

"Being placed as an alternate put things in perspective for me, to be honest. I got so caught up trying to be the best. The best in school. The best in figure skating. The better sibling. All for my dad who doesn't even see me and would probably just slap me and say 'don't be stupid' if I tried to express myself. It was hard for me to accept it, which is why I'm here, but it's time for me to do things for me. To be good enough for me. So thank you, Matt. Really."

"Wow. I'm so sorry, Chris."

"Nah, it's okay. I know I'll be alright. I just need to get through the Olympics first."

I went closer to him and gave him a long hug (which he did not pass up).

"You should head back to camp. It's late. I've gotta go to bed anyway."

"Good night, Chris"

"You take care"

Author's Note: Hi everyone, hope you're all staying safe in this trying time. It's been a while but I'm back. Special thank you to Matty Loonabish for inspiring me and motivating me. Ily and stay safe. ♡