bittersweet • rini au

08

another two weeks had passed and they were settled back into their normal routines.

one hour session had become two-hour sessions to whole afternoons together. they flowed, they worked. he made her laugh and she made him feel smart.

the pair that couldn't stand being in the same room had become inseparable.

they were sitting in ricky's room, enjoying another tuesday afternoon, soft music filled the room and soft laughter filled their ears.

he was still a pain in the ass, his jock personality jumping in the conversation every time he didn't understand an equation. he got flustered and annoyed, and to this day didn't understand the need to mix the numbers with the alphabet.

the brunette kept her chill, she was used to this, being the best student in the school wasn't as easy as everyone thought, she had spent hours crying, just trying to understand a chemistry worksheet. she knew the struggle and felt sorry for ricky, because she knew how frustrating it was to not understand.

so she was patient with him, guiding him all the steps of the way.

but today was one of those long tiring days, they had had chinease takeout because she quickly learned neither of the bowens knew how to make anything edible. so they decided it was better not to alarm the firefighters due to burnt pasta. however, she had brought her famous cupcakes, which became a requirement for their sessions. she loved baking, and thanks to those green frosted cupcakes, and her persuasive words, he had been clean for almost a month.

nini saw how frustrated he was starting to get and picked another pastry to calm his anxiety.

"hey, one day you'll have to make me some cupcakes," she laughed putting down her pencil. "what-?" he screamed with his mouthful. "manners richard..." she bossed him. "yeah, one-day i'll give you seb's famous recipe so that way you can bake the cutest cupcakes you'll ever eat."

he rolled his eyes, swallowing the last bits of the cupcake. "fine, but only if you teach me, because, golden girl, i could burn the kitchen. that's just coming from personal experience."

"stop calling me that, and you have a deal" she smiled seeing his face filled with hope. "talking about hobbies, i've been here countless times, and not once have i heard you play this beautiful acoustic guitar," she crawled next to where the guitar was standing and took it into her arms.

ricky jumped and his expression fell as if she had just dropped a baby. "nina what are you doing" he said a little too loud. he sat next to her looking at the object with glossy eyes.

"c'mon bowen, you don't think i know what i'm doing?" then she corrected her posture and made sure the strings were tuned up. and then she started playing a soft melody he had never heard before.

once again, he just stared at her, completely dumbfounded by her. she surprised him every single time, she was definitely not like others, she was special, filled with talents. he just observed how focused she was, from the delicate movement in her fingertips stroking the guitar, her posture and breathing perfectly coordinated and her eyes closed focusing on whatever song she was playing. he was mesmerized, ricky didn't know she played an instrument, let alone this well, and by the look of it she also composed because he had never heard the melody. she let her finish and continued to look at her.

she slowly opened her eyes, and laughed. "take a picture, i'll last longer," she put the guitar back in the stand and grabbed her phone to look at the hour. "you never told me you could play or compose, nini, that was really really good," he said not hiding the excitement in his voice.
"there are tons of things you don't know about me quarterback, but yeah, i play guitar, piano, ukelele and write songs. but hey you didn't hear that from me." yet again he was surprised, he thought he knew this girl, turns out he had no idea.

"for real, nini why didn't i know this," she smiled. "please, no one knows, just my close friends and my sister. my moms never allowed it, they always said it took precious study time, and since a high school diploma is more important, they prohibited me to play. i know it sounds stupid and a little bit of an overreaction but it's just the way my life goes."

she felt ricky moving behind her but decided to keep focusing on her phone, she had just revealed a part of herself to him. and she was embarrassed but at the same time relieved he knew now. then she heard the guitar again and his sweet voice.

falling in and out of love
can make it hard to love yourself

she turned around and sat in front of him. he was singing, to her.
that's something she knew, the infamous bowen songs, he didn't sing in public, but he did in private and the few lyrics that some of the girls had shared were beautiful.
actually listening to him, that was another world.

someone puts you on a pedestal then leaves you on the shelf
and you're left to wonder what you did or didn't do enough
painfully, you tell yourself you are not worthy of their love

he was so into his song. she could feel the pain in his voice, whoever had hurt him it had left a big deep scar.

oooh, you brought self-doubt in
then just walked out in
to a painless place you can call home
leavin me on the floor
not so sure anymore

her eyes betrayed her and let a few tears escape. the song was beautiful, and his voice even more. she was astonished and grateful.

i am left losing sleep over you

he finished and put the guitar back in its place. she looked at nini and saw the small tears escaping her eyes. he never wanted to see her like that. at the same time, he noticed she was smiling. "ricky, that was beautiful, i'm speechless, that was incredible." his face softened, she had liked it. he had written it a while ago, using the girl that broke his heart as inspiration.

they stayed silent for a few seconds. "can i hug you?" she whispered looking into his eyes. no one deserved to feel that way.

he nodded and she put her hands around her neck and he simply grabbed her waist. it wasn't awkward, or nothing of the sort.
they just fit, right into each other arms.
"i just wanted to say," she said as she sniffled, "you do deserve love ricky, and whoever the song was about, clearly didn't deserve you."

he hugged her tighter. he had never sung that song to anyone, but he felt comfortable enough to share it with her.

"thank you," he answered. surprised she just asked, "why?"

"for making me those green cupcakes a month ago," she laughed and looked at him.

"anytime bowen"