I Think I Love You | Randy

track 30. i want you to want me - cheap trick

I'd love you to love me.

***

Brook wrapped his hands around the steaming mug of tea, blowing on it gently before he took a sip. Rye and I watched him, exchanging nervous looks between us as we gave him his time to talk.

"Sorry for coming over," he said eventually. "I didn't know where else to go, I just walked right out of the house."

"What happened?" I asked gently.

"We had a big fight."

"Because?"

He looked at me shamefully. "It gonna sound stupid."

"I'm sure it's not, Brook."

Brook sighed. "He didn't wanna come with me to my cousins's wedding."

"Why not?" I frowned. "He's met a lot of your family already, right?"

"That's what I said," Brook groaned. "But he freaked out because apparently family events are a huge deal now that we're dating."

"And you don't think so?"

"Well, no. Not for my family at least," Brook explained. "They know Jack and I already told them we're together. I got my mum all excited about me bringing him home again as my official boyfriend. It's embarrassing."

"Don't you think that's jumping the gun if you hadn't asked Jack yet?" Rye cut in, and I shot him a what the fuck? look, Brook clearly just needing to be listened to right now.

"It's not like I'm asking him to come out to his family yet," Brook argued. "But this is important to me and he outright refused to do it."

"Is that why you broke up?" I asked.

"Yeah, I guess but it's kinda deeper than that," Brook went on sadly. "It goes back to the whole reason I didn't wanna go there with him in the first place. I love him, I really do, but I've been out of the closet for years. I'm not going to start hiding my relationships now, especially to my family. Why should I?"

"That's fair," I said.

Brook hummed. "Anyway it turned into a whole thing. We both said things... Worst part is I feel horrible now about walking out on him because I'm scared he's gonna relapse again."

"Maybe you shouldn't have walked out on him then," Rye said.

"Rye!" I cut him off scoldingly. He was being out of line, and the fact that he'd chosen this hill to die on made me more than uncomfortable.

"I'm just saying if you love him then you should give him time."

"But what about what Brook needs?" I argued before Brook could speak for himself. "He's not asking for for much more than not having to walk back into the closet where his own family is concerned."

"They still know he's gay."

"But having to hide his relationship is essentially the same thing," I said, looking at him with concern. The conversation was obviously hitting home for him.

"I didn't mean to cause trouble for you two." Brook looked guiltily between us. "I can go."

"Don't be silly," I told him. "You can stay here as long as you need."

He shot me a grateful smile. "Thanks."

"And you shouldn't feel guilty about having a fight," I added. "Your needs matter to." I looked at Rye as I made a point to echo the very words he'd used for me all those years ago when Mikey had been treating me poorly just because he wasn't ready to come out. It wasn't an excuse for him then, and it wasn't a good one for Jack now.