42: Worried Every Second

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"Honey get on the boat", we tried to persuade Leah to get on the boat as she looked from the peer, nobody knew of her fear of boats, until now. It was impossible to live in Seattle and not go on ferry boats, but Leah she had never gone. Her teary eyes wept as she focused on the rushing water from under the dock, she shrieked with horror as she heard the water collide beneath her.

"Nolan is still here, Natawee we have to stay", she complained as I felt strongly against leaving, what if he needed help or got hurt no one would be there to confront him when he's sick. He had told me that he would only worry if I was there, and If I wasn't he wouldn't have to worry, but it left me worrying every hour, every minute, every second, he was all alone, surrounded by millions of people he didn't know.

"He gave me a phone we can call him I promise", I tried to reason with her as everyone watched as she and I were left on the deck. Alison looked worried as Leah shook her head impatiently.

"Promise", she looked at me with sweet eyes as I pinkie promised her that I would. She sat in my arms as I hopped over the arch and landed on the boat. I felt that wobbly sensation as I steadied myself and Leah on our feet, I put her down as she leaned into me as she felt the water-rock her.

"Can we call him now", she jumped with glee at me as the Captain gave us the sail away call, announcing we were leaving and I watched as the land became slower and slower as I went silent, Leah nagged at my shirt.

"Na-", I snapped out of my endless thoughts as I paid attention to the little girl who missed the same person I did, and all we could do was be there for each other.

I took the phone out of my pocket as Leah looked confused by it all. This wasn't a phone, like a cell phone, it was a flip phone, I loved flip phones, texting isn't the same as hearing that person's voice, and knowing that they are okay, and emails, it's not the same as staring your emails with dear and ending with a sign-off.

I flipped the phone open as his contact popped up, with a picture of him and I smiling, and I closed my eyes humming as I listened to the ring of the phone, bring me back to that time. Our hands touched as we walked into the house, Alison greeted us as we walked in and he held my hand the whole way, he then asked for a picture of both of us, and now I know why he took it.

"Hi baby", his sweet voice shifted me back into reality as I shivered at his voice, so soothing, so calming. I wish he wasn't the one I was worried about.

"Hi," I said nervously as I felt all my nerves enlighten on fire as I heard his heavy breathing through the phone, it gave my heart a break knowing he was safe and sound.

"How is my sweet angel doing?", his words were soothing and gentle, but what I needed was him. His gentle caress against my skin and his eyes peering into mine, I wished with all my heart he was here.

"I'm worrying about you", a nagging Leah pulled at my shirt as she wanted to talk to the man of the hour. He laughed as I knew he would say there was no need too because he would be fine, but that's what they all say when you lose someone you love it changes a person when you say don't worry about me that's all I do.

"I'm right here, there's no need to worry, because I'll be seeing you shortly", he said as I told him about the little munchkin tugging my shirt, I handed the phone as she walked away leaving me in my space alone.

The land got smaller and smaller until all that was left was a little speck that shortly disappeared into the sunny horizon. The waves crashed against the boat as Leah came running up to me.

"He said he wanted to talk to you in, private", she said as she pointed to downstairs, while everyone else was on the deck. I took the telephone and brought it up to my ear as I made my way downstairs as I went into one of the bedrooms and shut the door, I collapsed onto the bed.

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