My Source of Happiness [COMPLETED]

🔷 21 - Fade 🔷

[Angin's POV]

It was silent. Neither me nor my big brother dared to even start a conversation. I don't know why but, I feel tense with this quiet atmosphere around us.

Me and my big brother were only walking in silence. Honestly, I wanted to talk to him about the incident earlier. I wanted to speak up that Tanah didn't do anything wrong, and that he saved us from getting kidnapped.

But my mouth remained shut.

I secretly glanced at my big brother. There, I saw him, frowning, like he's irritated about what had happened earlier. His eyes were still focused on the road we were walking, not even once he looked at me to at least, check up on me.

I quietly sighed through my nose, my brows furrowed melancholy. I slowly lowered my head, staring down at the ground gloomily. I feel like he's angry at me...

It didn't take long before we finally arrived home, with my big brother opening the door impatiently. Both of us went inside, stopping at the entrance afterwards.

There, we saw our mother, preparing our dinner for later. She then glanced at our direction, her face looked like it lightened up the moment she saw us and also somewhat, worried.

"How did your hangout go?" She asked, as she formed a small smile on her lips. "And, where have you two been? It's almost night-time. Good thing both of you managed to get here before dinnertime."

My big brother and I remained standing near the doorway, none of us didn't even reply back to Mom. I took a quick glance at my big brother, and he was just staring at her expressionlessly. I feel like it's just rude to ignore our mother like that so, I was the one who broke the akward atmosphere around us instead.

"Ah, Mom! We really did have a good time together! I really enjoyed our hangout earlier!" I lied, as I forced a wide smile on my face, just so our Mom wouldn't find us a bit suspicious.

Fortunately, our mother buy it and smiled back to our direction. "That's great to hear! I hope you two would hangout again someday!" She stated, smiling warmly at us once more before looking back at what she's doing, continuing to cook for our dinner. You should be happy big brother, that I lied to her for you.

'I hope so...' I thought, as I bit my bottom lip. I still kept my smile on my face, insisting that everything really did turned out the way she wanted it to be. Even though it didn't...

Unexpectedly, Lucky jumped at me out of nowhere, almost making me lose my balance and started licking my face afterwards. I chuckled slightly, patting his head afterwards. Few moments later, he got off me, so I can finally stood up straightly.

Then, I heard my big brother groaned in annoyance, making me trembled a bit. I feel like he's looking at me for some reason, so I slowly glanced at him. He is. He is staring at me, but in a cold way.

I saw him gritted his teeth, with both of his arms crossed on his chest. Now, I felt anxious. Why is he looking at me like that?

Then, I heard him muttered something, and unfortunately for him, I heard the whole thing he said. But then, I regretted listening to it. Because, I knew, that what he said... belonged to me.

"I hope your sickening smile will fade away."

After that, he went pass me, going upstairs to his room afterwards. Sadly for me, I stayed rooted on the ground, as I felt my heart ached. I forced a chuckle from what he said, hoping that what he said was just a joke.

But, why did those few words hurt me so much?

It's weird how you can actually feel it in your chest and stomach when something really hurts your feelings.

But, did he really mean what he said? That he wished for my smile to disappear? Or maybe, it has another meaning to it? Like, he wished for my happiness to... vanish?

I felt a tear escaped from my eyes, but still, I just laughed that thought off, but in a pained way. He didn't mean that, right? Again, another tear fell down from my face, but still, I remained smiling.

I thought I should feel happy? I thought I should stay happy, just like what he said? But, why does he want it to fade away?

If that's what he thinks, does that also mean that... he doesn't need me anymore? For me to make him feel happy? For me to put a smile on his face?

Maybe, he really doesn't need my happiness anymore. Since, he'd already found it, thanks to his so-called friends. I guess, I'm a nobody to him anymore...

Heh, and it just hurts...

It pains me to realise, that he meant everything to me, but I meant nothing to him.

I still love my big brother. I really do. I never replaced him with anyone else in this world. He was the one who made me happy all these years.

But, isn't it surprising? The one who brings you great happiness, will also bring you great pain and sadness?

But, honestly, I didn't care anymore.

Even when my heart gets broken, I'll still be here if you need me...