head in the clouds | jd.morgan

xvi. quiet voices.

head in the clouds. chapter seventeen.
SUMMARY ; margo calls jeffrey just to hear his voice.

❝ what am i now?
what if i'm someone i don't want around ❝
——

THE NEXT FEW months seemed to drag on for years, every day repeated itself, the routine never changed and the everything stayed the same. margo's daily routine was never like this — at least it didn't seem like it, she felt like she was constantly waiting for something that was never going to happen. the nights were worse, margo could never stop glancing at the time on the digital clock that occupied her nightstand and thinking to herself what she would've been doing at that time if jeffrey was home.

school had started back up, she was in her junior year now, though not much seemed to change from the previous year excluding her home situation. margo had grown rather quiet, her friends noticed immediately and they did bug her about it the first week and a half, but after that it was like they had just decided to get used to it, they stopped questioning her and moved on. any other time this would've offended margo, she would've fussed that they didn't care about her, but not now. she couldn't have cared less about their attention or their worries, not when the only person she wanted attention from was gone.

diana and margo barely spoke, the woman left the household for work before the teen woke in the morning, and she always returned home before the blonde so she made sure to stay hidden in her bedroom. it was like a secret routine they had, they would wait to hear the other one's door open first before exiting their room, their relationship was truly destroyed. margo couldn't even remember the last full conversation she's had with someone, which was highly unlike her, her whole life she was constantly being told how much she ran her mouth but that was clearly not the case nowadays.

her friends noticed, her mother noticed, her friend's parents noticed, her teachers noticed, but no one cared too much to really dig deep and try to get through to the girl, everyone moved on with their everyday lives. thus only proving to margo just how much jeffrey did for her, he wouldn't let her go twenty minutes without speaking before he was on her case asking what was wrong, and he never let up until he got the truth. margo could always count on him to notice when she  was sad, she knew she would always have him to talk to, now he was gone and she had to keep everything bottled inside.

it was late on a friday evening, almost ten thirty, margo was home alone and her mother was god knows where, the blonde had been invited out to a sleepover at one of the girl's house, but margo didn't believe they truly wanted her there, the invite was more out of pity. but she couldn't blame them, she knew she was no fun nowadays, she barely spoke. so margo declined the invite once more, she had stopped even bothering coming up with excuses, she knew it was only a matter of time before the invites stopped anyways.

margo had been seated on the living room couch, some old disney princess moving playing on the screen, the blonde has always been guilty of trying to distract herself with her favourite childhood movies, though it didn't seem to be working as well as usual this time around. margo has lost count of how many times she's picked up her phone, clicked on jeffrey's contact and just stared at it. she feared rejection, she feared him ignoring her, she feared him yelling at her to leave him alone. she doesn't think she could handle much more heartbreak.

she hated the person she was becoming, this margo was so quiet, so miserable and so lonely, though she couldn't blame the people around her for starting to trickle away, she wasn't much fun to be around anymore. she never truly knew just how much jeffrey impacted her life until he was gone, and margo feared she would never be that girl again.