Roll for Initiative

"We need to talk"

Even though Minho announced that there was something important that he wants to talk about he doesn't follow through with it right away. Instead, the first question he asks is about the opening hours of the local grocery stores. And upon noticing that even the ones that are usually opened a little longer will probably close in about fifteen minutes all other conversation is abandoned as they hurry to the closest one so Minho can get a jug of milk and some vegetables for his mother

But even after they have left the store together Minho doesn't bring it up again. And Chan doesn't dare to ask. He is relatively sure what this conversation will be about. There is one looming topic that he has decided to ignore. Like a storm cloud on the horizon that he hoped would just pass. But now he's standing in the pouring rain without an umbrella.

They're going to have to talk about the future eventually. Talk about where they are going from here. And that is a conversation that Chan is incredibly scared off.

There are two ways he can see that one turning out right now. Number one, probably the more likely but also the worse option, Minho breaks things off with him. Well, they have only really been dating for a day. Probably best to end it now while it's still easy. Maybe they can enjoy a few more days together, fool around a little and end things as friends. A meaningless little summer fling. Something they will look back on eventually and smile about. But Chan is leaving for Seoul in a few days and if Minho stays here with his mother that marks the end of their summer days together. And ultimately a long-distance relationship would be too much to handle. Especially after only really knowing each other for maybe a month at best. Easier to just rip off the bandaid now instead of trying and failing at maintaining a relationship despite all that distance. Even with text messaging and all these other things that could make it easier to stay in touch it would probably still not be enough. Chan even forgets to text his mother back most of the time.

And then there is the second option, the better scenario in which Minho announces that he will also go back to Seoul for the semester. Chan remembers that Minho brought up that topic in a conversation at some point. But only briefly. As more of an aside, he mentioned how he was considering to accept that offer from the dance school there and maybe move in with his father again. Or try to find a place of his own. But the last time they talked about it Minho hadn't really made his decision yet. And neither of them have brought it up again since. But even if Minho were to move back to Seoul that's not a guarantee that they would be able to maintain their relationship when it's still so fragile. Things would be different. Because to Chan, Minho is walks on the beach, the bittersweet taste of lemonade on his tongue and the burning heat of a nearby bonfire on his skin. And somehow he can't imagine them being together anywhere else in any other way. It feels unreal to think about Minho as a part of his university life from now on, to imagine holding hands with him in the bustling city streets and sit late at night in a coffee shop instead of walking along the beach. Chan has always done his best to ignore the fact that they're days together were numbered by only focusing on the moment. The beach walks, the sunsets, the light summer rain. But by ignoring that there is a world outside of this perfect little bubble he has also bound their relationship to this place. And now trying to imagine it existing anywhere else feels like a fantasy. Way more than he should be allowed to ask for.

"You seem distracted", Minho comments. Him suddenöly speaking up after they have walked in silence for so long startles Chan a little. He had almost forgotten about Minho over his own thoughts.

"Sorry, did you say something?"

"No, and neither have you for the past five minutes or so. But I tried taking your hand like three times now and you haven't even really looked at me once." Minho lets out a loud sigh. He looks frustrated rather than actually upset. Which is probably worse actually.