Roll for Initiative

So long and thanks for all the fish

"Are you sure you really want to do this?", Chan asks, watching his boyfriend the slightly oversized shirt over his head. It is a little bit too large for Minho because it actually does belong to Chan. But well, their clothes do tend to get mixed up a lot and who can really say which shirt belongs to whom. At least Minho claims that there is hardly a difference at this point every time he grabs a shirt from Chan's half of the closet they share. Chan doesn't really mind. In fact, he thinks that it's somewhat cute.

"We went over this", Minho groans, letting the shirt drop to the floor casually, not minding that it might get dirty in the process. "I told you that I want to do this, I've been wanting to try this since forever. Besides, didn't you just recently say that we should try something new together?"

"I did, but I thought more along the lines of trying to make more homecooked meals or learning how to rollerskate", Chan replies. But regardless of his complains he pulls his own shirt over his head with a sigh and slips out of his worn sneakers. He already dreads having to walk up all the way back here barefooted to retrieve them again. The path leading up here is kind of rocky with some roots that might trip you if you don't pay close attention. But it's the best spot for what they are about to do that Chan could think of. Diving off a cliff, that is.

"We can still get into rollerskating, isn't their a small shop in the next town where you can rent stuff like that? We could ask the others to join us, I'm pretty sure Felix and Jisung would be very much into that."

Yeah, they'd probably be all over the idea. And they'd also probably end up dragging poor Changbin along with them who's sure to complain about it but secretly also enjoy it the entire time. They're a weird bunch. Chan's best friends, and by now probably also Minho's. They haven't seen them in a while though. With Chan and Minho living together in Seoul and the other three in Busan, it's not like they can just meet up casually whenever they want to. At first, they had talked about moving to Seoul as well, but then both Jisung and Changbin had gotten offers for a music production course there. And Felix, who somehow wound up deciding to pursue a career as a kindergarten teacher, had followed them eagerly. The three of them share a small studio apartment together which seems like an odd arrangement, but they're basically inseparable. It does make group calls a little more difficult though. Because even when all three of them are in different rooms you can usually still hear at least one of them – it's usually Jisung – scream in the background through two additional audio sources. That does tend to make their Discord Dungeons and Dragons sessions a little exhausting sometimes, but it's still a tradition they all hold onto. They've also tried a few different one-off tabletop roleplaying games. Recently Minho has tried to take charge as the DM for the first time which ended up being a slightly chaotic but also very much entertaining evening. Most of Chan's experiences with Minho end up being like that. Chaotic and not always that well-thought-out but a lovely memory to look back onto in retrospect. However, he's still not fully convinced that jumping off a cliff to conquer your fears really falls into that category.

"Don't you think we should maybe start with something smaller though? You know, like some sort of climbing park? Or one of those zip line thingies?" Don't you think we should do something where you are secured instead? Is what Chan actually means to ask. Because while he absolutely adores Minho and admires his bravery and determination he would much rather see his boyfriend face his fears while he has a sturdy rope securing him and preventing any actual falling.

"We're already here, so either you jump with me or you watch me do it alone", Minho says. That's pretty much a knockout argument. Because no matter how Chan feels about this he would never let Minho jump alone. Heck, he doesn't even let him go to the store alone. At least not when it's dark outside and especially not since Minho has, in passing, mentioned how he felt that some weird guy was kind of staring at him from a bus station near their apartment complex.

"So I guess we're doing this."

"Great, give me your hand."

"Isn't holding hands kind of dangerous? What if we crash into each other?"

"Isn't the whole point of this thing that it's kind of dangerous?", Minho frowns. Chan could of course retort that cliff-diving, if done correctly, is actually not really that dangerous – he's spent hours researching this while they were on the train here – but he decides to remain silent. Because even if Minho doesn't want to show it, Chan knows that his boyfriend is scared. Maybe even terrified. And rightfully so, even for someone who isn't particularly scared of heights, jumping off a cliff doesn't really come naturally. But Chan also knows that Minho wouldn't want him to address that fear, so he switches the topic instead.

"Man, remember when I first told you about this place, feels like forever ago", he says. Actually he knows exactly how long ago it was and sometimes it feels like it was only yesterday. Minho snorts.

"It's been three years you big doofus, don't pretend you don't know, that's kind of almost our anniversary."

"Okay, you got me, but it's crazy how time flies, huh?", Chan pauses a moment as if he is waiting for Minho to reply to that question even though it was clearly rhetorical. Of course, he doesn't, so Chan is forced to continue with his sappy little speech. "I'm really glad that you're still with me. Even though I'm probably the worst sometimes. Even though I always forget about doing the dishes and stay up way too late to churn out a twelve-page essay in one night instead of going to bed with you. I'm really grateful to have you in my life."

"And I'd be really grateful if you would just give me your hand and jump with me."

Chan laughs, blindly reaching for Minho's hand at the same time.

"Do you wanna count?", he asks. Minho shakes his head.

"You do it, I'd probably chicken out before I get to one."

"Okay so... three..."

Chan lightly squeezes his boyfriend's hand and he responds by closing his fingers around Chan's hand like a vise. It reminds Chan of how Minho squeezed his hand when he got a small tattoo on his left ankle a few months ago. Three squiggly lines that are supposed to look like the ocean and a half circle with some straight lines arranged around it for the setting sun above them. And probably Chan had squeezed Minho's hand back just as hard when he got the same tattoo on his right ankle half an hour later.

"Two..."

When Chan had first told Minho about this little place where he once jumped off a cliff together with some friends from school he would have never thought that three years later they'de be here together. And even more, that after jumping down and swimming back to shore they would probably embrace and giggle and kiss each other and then hike back up the hill dripping and barefooted to retrieve their clothes before going back to stay with their separate parents for a few weeks of summer vacation. And after that, they'd go back to Seoul where they share a small apartment with three cats and a bunch of plants that don't require regular watering. Such as the three plastic roses standing on their coffee-stained kitchen table, an empty lemonade bottle for a vase because they are both nostalgic and like decorating their shared space with little trinkets that are meaningful to them.

"One."

Surprisingly it's Minho who pulls Chan forward as soon as the word has left his mouth. It's two steps, a leap and then they're jumping, falling. Flying. Maybe Minho is screaming, it's hard to make out over the sound of air whooshing around Chan's head and before he can even realise it, they've hit the water. It stings a little and he accidentally swallows a mouth full of the salty ocean water. He's lost Minho's hand somewhere along the way and he is splashing around frantically, trying to find his boyfriend. Seconds later, Minho's head emerges from the water. His spitting water but laughing at the same time, shaking his head wildly to get the wet strands of hair out of his face and spraying Chan with water.

"That was amazing!", he shouts. "We should do that again."

Chan shakes his head. "No, look", he says, pointing to the far-off horizon. The ocean seems to be even more vast and endless when you are in it and there is nothing but water surrounding you. "The sun is already setting", Chan explains, "it'll be dark by the time we're back up there. And I don't want to risk not finding our way back to shore because of that."

"Ugh, fine Mr Buzzkill", Minho complains, purposely splashing even more saltwater into Chan's face. "We'll do it another time then."

"Yeah... another time", Chan agrees. Because for now, if not forever, there will always be another time.