Eev and Ank

Episode 6a Eev and Ank

"People should be way more scared of the universe" -Ralph

I don't know how I will survive this, I know my friends are here for me, but now Eev is gone and Lucas is in Belgium, it is hard. This week will be though, if it is for a week, in Skam Even leaves Isak then he goes back to Sonja and after the second week they come back together. It feels like I am in a Skam story too, but I don't know if I can handle that everything is already predicted. I will not go back to Lucas any time soon, but Eev is the one who left and she doesn't have a boyfriend. I don't know what will happen but I know that I will make it my story and I can make choices in where my story will end.

I spend the whole evening with Nash and his boyfriend Shane at their apartment. I wake up at their couch, I still feel like shit, but it is better when I smell the fresh croissants Shane made. I feel less hopeless, when I arrive at my apartment I call Lucas I hope he can sheer me up now. He doesn't pick up, I see he was online two minutes ago, so I text him. He replies he is at Jens but he can call in the living room. I am so happy to see him again, someone I can trust and who understands me. He looks worried, I tell him that it was about Eev, I thought she liked me but she just walked away when I told her you and I are just friends now. "Maybe she wasn't ready yet, but she will come back when she is," he replies. It sounds useless that is exactly what Nash said yesterday. "You want to hear something that might cheer you up?" I nod but don't know what I should expect. He hesitates for a moment, but tells me he went on a date. It is a bit double now, but "I am so happy for you tell me more about it." "Are you sure?" he asks in Dutch , "is it not too soon?" I shake my head, "I want to know about it." "Who do you think it is?" I start laughing and scream "Jens of course, that is obvious." He looks surprised "but we never spoke about my sexuality." That is something I needed to think about "I know, but I think I always knew especially when you started talking about Jens." "You know what I mostly like about living in Belgium is speaking Dutch I missed it so much." It is so weird that we just switched to talking Dutch, both is so natural. "But how was your date?" I ask in English, the language we mostly speak when we talk to each other. "It was so much fun we already hung out a couple of times, but it was always with someone else or at school. Now it was just the two of us and we went to his house. He was nervous because his friends don't really come over that often. I already felt it was something special, he acted weird and I first thought it was because of his house. But when we arrived in his bedroom we set on his bed and he said that he was nervous but he didn't understand what he was feeling. I already knew I liked him, but only started to admit it after you decided to only be friends. I didn't want to break the friendship by saying anything about it. But he said it himself, 'maybe it is because I think about this as a ... date.' He waited for my answer and I was so relieved that I replied with kissing him. He was so in shock that he just sat there, nothing. I thought it was my fault but he explained he had never been with a boy before and didn't expect anything like this. I replied 'I didn't either but it just felt natural,' he smiled and said he was happy I liked him too. We talked for a very long time, it went dark and no train or bus went home anymore so he said I could sleep here and that is basically what happened yesterday and why I am here now." I reply that I am still so happy for him and I absolutely hope they will become a happy couple. "We aren't yet a couple it was just a date and we will see what happens next." I hear a door opening and see that Jens is standing in the opening with only a shirt and his boxer. I wave and say "Good morning." He looks at Lucas and asks in Dutch if this is his girlfriend. "Ex- girlfriend," I reply. He looks a little weird at me, "I didn't know you speak Dutch." "I do, but most of the time Lucas and I speak in English." "Ah that explains a lot. Nice to meet you, I heard a lot about you," he replies. "Same for me. But don't worry about me I fully support your relationship." Lucas looks shy all of a sudden, "sorry I already told her about our date yesterday." "Oh don't worry about it, you can tell people," he pauses "but just wait with people at school they don't really know I am bi," Jens says. "Of course we will do this together," Lucas says and gives Jens a kiss on his cheek. I feel a bit awkward and say "Have a nice time together guys, I will leave you two. I will call you soon, bye." "Bye," they reply together. It feels good to speak with Lucas, I really miss him to talk about basic things. I'm still very happy for him, but I'm longing for something like that myself.