Full Moon

Chapter 8: Realizations and Regrets

Tobias POV

I stood there watching Maria being carried away by her father. Guilt filling me almost instantly after what I did. I have this overwhelming feeling to run up to her and make sure she was ok and tell her I was sorry. Ugghhh why do I feel like this about her. Im not supposed to feel like this about her but damn ever since I met her I feel like I'm already in love with her.  I ran all the way home not even caring how there was still a party going on.

I've never even had an actual crush, like want the girl to be my girlfriend before but here I am about to cry myself because I hurt her. This doesn't make any sense.

I never wanted a girlfriend let alone a MATE!! But ever since I met her she's been on my mind constantly. I always want to talk to her, kiss her, hold her and it makes me so mad.

I'm not supposed to want a girl like actually want her to be my girl, I'm a player I've never had a real girlfriend.

I made it home and ran up to my room. I busted the door open and slammed it shut. I started throwing everything around my room.

After I was done my room was completely destroyed and I was sitting  in front of my door. I start to cry, her face today keeps playing in my mind over and over again, the way she looked at me, the hurt in her eyes when she seen who pushed her, the sound of her voice when she asked me why  I know that there was a deeper underlining meaning to that and it just makes me feel more like a piece of shit the I already did.

  The amount of guilt that instantly hit me right after I did that is unbelievable. I mean I always feel kinda guilty after I've done something to her but now it's a thousand times worse.

I pull my hair in frustration, I feel a panic attack coming on. I normally only get those when it's a big game coming up. I take a deep breath and try to control it.

After it calmed down I went and took a shower. When I got out I got dressed and cleaned up my room, don't need my parents seeing.

After I was done I laid down on my bed. My wolf isn't really saying much he's just in a corner whimpering.

*******

The next day I woke up and got ready for school. I wonder if I'll see Maria, I don't know I'll say to her though.

"Apologize... for everything" my wolf said. "It's not that easy what if she doesn't accept it. I don't even know what I want rn" I said back to him.
He just growled in response.

Right as I was about to say something someone knocked on the door.

"Come in" I said

My dad opens the door and pokes in his head. I look at him confused until my dad spoke up.

"Hey, are u alright....do u need anything"my dad said

A thought came to my mind and before I could stop myself I said it.

"Why are mates so special and important" I immediately wanted to punch myself in the face.

My dad walked in my room and sat on my bed.
"Come sit so we can talk"he said patting the spot next to him.

I sat down next to him ."what exactly does a mate mean" I asked him again.

"Well mate is short for soulmate and a soulmate is ur literal other half. The person that was made for u, their soul was made at the exact same time as yours. They're everything ur not but need, you're everything they're not but need.They can be exactly alike or polar opposites but still work perfect together.  They're who u can't live without out. They make us stronger and if we loose them we'll never be the same. Even humans have soulmates we're just lucky enough to be able to actually know if someone is our soulmate."