the treehouse | larry stylinson

twenty four

as it turned out, things were okay. all five of us had a great afternoon, playing mario kart and cuddling. well, niall was the one playing mario kart seriously, challenging harry who wasn't paying that much attention to the game, as he was half-hugging me all the time. for good luck was what he said.

it didn't work all that well, he was actually extremely bad at it, blaming me for being all cute and distracting. i didn't mind.

i was just so distracted by the fact that everything felt so right.

a few days later, harry and i were laying in the grass in my backyard, my head on harry's chest as he gently played with my hair.

"what's on your mind?" he asked me softly.

i let out a quiet snort. thing is, it was sort of funny how much of a mess everything was in my head, and even though i told him almost everything of it, he still hardly knew half of it.

so instead of responding, i turned over and kissed him. he raised his eyebrows and smiled, but went along with it, pulling me closer.

we parted our lips slowly, and he let out his incredibly beautiful laugh. "i like your thoughts, babe."

i pecked his lips again, "i do too."

i sat up and pulled him with me, so we were facing each other. i slowly traced his underarm, bringing it closer to me. he was wearing lots of bracelets over his wrists, just like he always did. i glanced up at him, asking for permission to keep going. his face had a unsure expression mixed with fear, but he took a deep breath and nodded.

i took of the bracelets one by one, revealing his thin, light red scars. i gently traced my thumb over them, making sure that i wasn't pushing it too far.

harry sighed, "i know they're ugly, i just... it's difficult to stop. i'm sorry."

"don't be sorry. i believe in you, okay? besides, they're a part of you and you're the most beautiful person i've ever seen in my life."

harry smiled sheepishly and put his head in the crook of my shoulder. after some silence he sighed again, "i've been through some shit, it's been tough. that's all."

i pressed a kiss to his forehead, "do you want to talk about it?"

"i don't know... i don't want you to think any different of me."

"hey! i'd never. i'm very much in love with you, and i plan on spending the rest of my life with you. nothing you do or did could ever change the way i feel about you."

the words left my lips all too quickly, and before even realizing what i had said, harry kissed me roughly.

harry broke the kiss first, "i love you," before going back in for another one.

once again, we were all caught up in each other. too in love with each other to care about anything else in the world.

"to think that you're the same boy who could barely say a full sentence without stuttering when we first met... you've come a long way my love," harry said softly after our kiss had come to an end.

of course, i blushed. "all thanks to you."

"i highly doubt that," he chuckled.

"it's true! you helped me, more than you know." i touched his scars again, "and i want to help you too. if you'll let me."

he frowned and nodded, "i just don't know if i can be helped, it's a bit more complicated than that."

"try me, i'll do my best." i smiled at him, "i'm a very good listener and um, i hope i'm good at advice, so i've got that going for me."

he laughed and shook his head, "you're also too cute for your own good." he smiled at me quickly before sighing and frowning again. "i don't know...it's quite heavy and it's a lot... are you sure you can handle that?"

"hm, how about this; a secret for a secret? i'll tell you one and you'll tell me one? and afterwards we don't have to talk about it. just put it out into the open right now." he nodded. "right so, i can start if you want. might as well just tell you this, it's not a secret or anything, i just haven't gotten myself to tell you this yet." he put his hand over mine and nodded for me to continue. "so, you know that night a few weeks ago when i called you and i was crying and then you came over?"

he frowned, "i do remember that, yeah."

"yeah. so the reason i was crying... well, i just... i got some bad news that day and... this is harder than i thought it would be."

"take your time, babe. i'm here for you."

i took a deep breath, "i got some bad news, and i was crying a lot and i was sad." i paused to sort my thoughts quickly, finally deciding that i would just say it. "my mum is sick."

the moment those words left my mouth, i had tears streaming down my face and suddenly, harry's arms were wrapped around me. it was as if he already knew what was going on, that i didn't have to explain any further for him to realize what had happened.

i wiped my tears away and harry let go of me, "your turn..."

he nodded, "there's lots of things... i guess um, the reason i moved here, it's because... my mum couldn't handle me being... the way i am." he paused and let out a shaky breath, "she couldn't control me and i was just too...too sad to care about how she was feeling after everything."

i was almost too afraid to ask, almost. "everything?"

he chuckled sadly, "i used to have a sister, gemma. she uh... she passed away a few years ago. she was sick, so very sick."

it felt like someone had punched my chest and i was ready to throw up and cry at the same time. "sick? harry..."

he hugged me, "i'm sorry, lou. i'm so sorry."

"that's what's gonna happen isn't it? she's gonna leave me... i'll be alone!" i sobbed into his shoulder, whilst he patted my back and tried to calm me down.

"it doesn't have to be that way, not everyone... pass."

it finally clicked with me, the reason he had gotten so emotional when we first watched the fault in our stars together... it was this. he had been through it all, but perhaps even worse. he had seen it happening right in front of him, he had been living in the same house as his sister for all of his life, just to one day come home and realize that she wouldn't ever be in her room playing loud music or just give him a hug and some sisterly advice when he needed it.

she was gone and he was broken.

-
a/n

h-h-h-heavy stuff...

hope you liked this chapter, i'm slowly working through and planning the rest of it.

keep on voting and commenting - it makes me motivated to update!

love, halie.