More Than Anything (Absinthe Series 4)

Kabanata 39

Kabanata 39

More Than Anything

The painful memory came back to me as I stared at the couple dancing in front of everybody. Pintang-pinta sa mukha ni Helion ang saya habang isinasayaw ang kaniyang asawa na si Raya. The couple looked perfect for each other, and their story, of how they met, how they fell apart and how they found each other again, made me envy them.

Sa pangalawang ikot ni Helion kay Raya ay napalingon ako kay Crithos. I saw him smiling, with a wine glass in his hand while staring at the couple. Ang ngiti niyang iyon, pakiramdam ko ay may pagkukulang doon. The way he smiled was different from before. His eyes were intense and clouded with a gloomy dust. When I had seen him laughing with Jeni, alam kong hindi iyon ang nakasanayan niyang pagtawa. He was a very different man now.

Bigla siyang napatingin sa akin at hindi ako kaagad na nakaiwas. He held my gaze as everyone around us continued cheering for the couple. Parang huminto ang oras para sa aming dalawa at hinihigop kami patungo sa isa't isa. His ashen eyes glowed for some reason as he took his step.

Nanatili ako sa aking pwesto at hindi iniiwas ang tingin sa kaniya. The soft mellow music surrounded the place. Ang nasa paligid ay isa-isang humawi at naghahanap ng kapareha.

I took my step back as Crithos took his time walking towards me. Ang iilang distansya ay sinarado niya at inangkin. Ang mga titig ay nakakapangatog ng tuhod lalong-lalo na ng ilahad niya ang kamay sa akin. Sumunod ang tingin ko sa kaniyang kamay na nasa ere. May pag-iiba sa ritmo ng aking pulso nang mag-angat ako ng tingin sa kaniya. He swallowed making his Adam's apple move up and down. His face soften as he took another step towards me.

"Dance with me?" he asked, his tone jittery and uncertain. My eyes dropped open to his awaiting hand. Sa nanginginig na kamay ay inangat ko ang akin at inilapat iyon sa kaniyang naghihintay.

Kinagat ko ang aking labi nang madama ang kaniyang init sa aking palad. The mix of pleasure and bliss was over the edge as his thumb touched the back of my hand, making a slow featherlight trace.

Mas lalo siyang lumapit sa akin at gumilid upang maibaba ang inuming dala. He held my hand tighter as he lead me towards the couples dancing in the middle of the place. I was in daze as I stared at him, not caring about the people. Naglalakad siya patalikod sa mga tao at nakaharap sa akin. There was something about his dinky smile as he pulled me close to him.

Suminghap ako nang ilapat niya sa kaniyang batok ang aking kamay. His other hand gently caught mine and placed it on his nape too. Ang mga mata niya ay hindi nahihiwalay sa akin. Pinagsalikop ko ang aking mga kamay na nasa kaniyang batok at hinaplos ang dulo ng kaniyang buhok. His familiar locks felt like home too.

Lumapat ang kaniyang dalawang palad sa aking baywang. Napatingin ako doon at mas lalong naramdaman ang init sa aking mukha. The way he held me was delicate and careful, like I was a fragile object for him. Mas lalo niyang inagaw ang distansyang naglalayo sa amin.

Muli akong napatingin sa kaniya. My lips parted as my eyes met his ashen ones. Ang intensidad ng kaniyang titig ay nagpapakita na hindi na siya katulad ng lalaking nakilala ko noon. Like he wanted me to see that this is how a real man should stare at the person that he treasured so much.

When the rain is blowing in your face
And the whole world is on your case
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make you feel my love

"I'm sorry..." he whispered to me as he started swaying our bodies. Every sway seems to follow the tone of the piano.

Mas lalo ko siyang iniyakap at isinandal ang ulo sa kaniyang dibdib. He had gotten so tall habang ako ay nanatili na sa ganoong tangkad, hindi na aabot pa sa kaniya. His body felt warm and hard against me but it felt like home.