imagine | jikook ✔

NINETEEN

JIMIN ;

"done" i exhaled , falling onto the floor . i cleaned the whole house , i disinfected , wiped , sprayed , threw away trash , picked up clothes , washed dishes , did laundry , swept , vacuumed , dusted , mopped and i even cooked dinner .

i felt an urge to clean after realizing that i wanted some sort of validation , validation of me being a good son .

i wanted to make them proud , even if i was close to collapsing . i lost a lot of weight these past two weeks causing me to lose energy .

i was practically shaking on the floor , attempting to grasp enough energy in order to make it back to the basement .

before i could get up i heard the front door open and close , i crawled to the door of the basement- trying to leave before i was trapped into any type of abuse .

i wasnt fast enough .

"oh you're here , its nice to see that my trash of a son is on the floor where he belongs ." my mom spoke out , walking towards me .

i just kept my head down , feeling like a disappointed .

"you know , you would've been a good son if you ; didn't dropout , was skinnier , respected us , and if you weren't gay- but sadly you ended up a disappointment ." she said , each degrading word felt like another stab to the heart .

"i wish i was good enough" i whispered , loud enough for her to hear . she crouched down to my level and replied , leaving me hurt .

"i wish you were to , you dumbass" she whispered back , walking down the hall , to her room .

i was hated by my parents , and my friends cared more for their boyfriends than for me .. in the end all i had was jeongguk .

i stood up , with much struggle- wobbling towards the basement .

i opened the door and locked it behind me , before i walked down the stairs . i almost tripped a few times but i made it to the bed .

once i sat down i felt jeongguk shift , reaching his arms out to me . he was still sleeping .

i pulled off the sweatpants and laid down . i didn't have any motivation to clean off the blood adorning my cuts and bruises , so i simply laid limp beside jeongguk .

i felt his arm sneak around my waist , pulling me closer to him . i hissed slightly at the pain , my body being sore .

once i was situated in his grasp , i felt my eyes water .

i am so tired , i am tired of feeling empty and useless .

i just wanted to rest , i needed to rest .

i soon started crying , my body jerked as i let out painful sobs . i couldn't control it , i tried but i couldnt . luckily i wasn't too loud , so jeongguk could still peacefully sleep .

tear poured down my cheeks as i held onto jeongguk's shirt , in a search for comfort .

i heard him groan as i did so , causing me to internally bash myself .

he shifted a bit more , before his eyes opened up . he looked down at me with a sleepy smile on his face , which quickly changed to confusion .

"whats wrong?" he asked concerned , bringing me into a hug .

"i- i am so tired gguk , i- am really so tired" i spoke , through my tears , slightly choking on my tears .

"let it out minnie , i feel you . i am here , just let it out"

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