Bellarke One Shots Book 2

99) And Hides Her Somewhere In Herself, Safe From Harm

Archive of our own
By: Chash
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It doesn't start raining until the bus passes the New York State border; Octavia sees the sign welcoming them only about ten minutes before the sky opens up, and even though she knows none of the water is getting on her through the window, she can't help feeling damp and cold and personally targeted.

Teenage narcissism, her mother would have said. Now even the weather is all about you. You never think about anyone but yourself. You're driving me to an early grave.

She can't blame herself for what happened, but, well. Her mom ended up in the early grave anyway, so at some point, it stops mattering how she ended up there. The final result is the same. Octavia is on a bus, headed to Albany to see her brother for the first time in eight years.

To live with her brother.

Albany isn't actually her final destination. Bellamy told the social worker he'd meet them there, because his town is too small to be on the bus route. Anya, said social worker, hasn't looked up from her phone the whole time they've been in transit. Not that Octavia wants to talk, but--it's weird, right? It's all really weird. But Anya probably does this all the time.

They have a layover when they switch buses in New York City, but it's still raining when they get to Albany. The bus station is gray and unpleasant and honestly just discouraging. She follows Anya off the bus without looking up, afraid of what she'll see.

She was six, the last time she saw her brother, and he was sixteen. She thinks she'll recognize him, but how can she be sure? She's not sure if she's more afraid she'll know him, or she won't.

In her memory, Bellamy is the best brother ever. He was always there for her, always took care of her, always had time for her. He picked her up from school and listened to her talk about her day. He made her lunch and braided her hair and loved her.

And then his dad showed up and threatened to sue for custody, and Mom gave him away instead of dealing with the court case. Just let his dad take him. Octavia kept telling herself he'd be back, once he turned eighteen, once he stopped belonging to his father. That he wouldn't leave her behind.

But he never came back. She never heard from him at all. By the time her mother died, she'd given up on ever seeing her brother again, and when social services took her in, she was prepared for four years of foster care, until she could just take care of herself, like she has been since he left.

Instead, they found Bellamy.

Anya gets her bag for her, and then she's back to jabbing at her phone. "We're on time, so I assume your brother is here, but--"

When she finally lets herself check the crowd, she spots him instantly. He's looking around too, and she realizes with a lurch that he doesn't recognize her. The difference between six and fourteen is huge, but he looks almost the same, a little older, his hair shaggier, curling more than it used to, but otherwise Bellamy. Her big brother.

He's wearing a black peacoat and jeans, glasses instead of contacts, and it opens up a hole in her that never really healed, just the sight of him. He looks so grown up.

He startles, checks his phone and picks it, and Octavia says, "I see him," before Anya can tell him they're here. "Over there, in the black coat." If she listens hard, she can hear his voice, just faintly. Hi, Anya? Are you guys--

When his eyes hit her again, she holds up her hand, this tiny little wave, and he just stares at her for a long minute, his expression so raw it hurts.

And then he's across the space between them and hugging her.

"Hey, O," he says, against her hair.