Chapter Four

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Cas was curled up in his recliner, the third Harry Potter book lying on the armrest. He had tried to start reading it a few times, but his brain was too sluggish to concentrate on anything.

He'd had three more seizures by the end of that week, each one sapping his energy, and fogging his mind.

'You ready to go?' Dean asked, coming over to him.

'I need, um... I need...' He frowned and pointed at his feet.

'Shoes?'

'Yes. Shoes.'

'Okay, I'll get you some shoes.' Dean bit his lip, troubled, but brought Cas over some shoes.

Cas slipped his feet in and stood up slowly, Dean hovering close to him. 'Let's go,' Cas said, once firmly on his feet.

'Are you sure you don't need your chair?'

'I can get to the car,' Cas snapped, 'just give me a second.'

Hurt flashed across Dean's face, and Cas regretted letting his frustration spill out.

'Maybe you could help me,' Cas said, reaching for Dean's arm.

Dean let him take it, and they both walked to the front door, shutting Hoagie inside before they went to the car. Dean patted his pocket for his notebook before getting in.

Cas sat in the passenger side with his eyes closed. Despite his lack of energy, Cas was still having trouble sleeping at night, and could only manage a few short naps during the day.

'Okay, you rest, we'll be there soon,' Dean said, starting the car.

Cas didn't say anything, but he didn't sleep either. He couldn't pretend not to hear the concern in Dean's voice, or the gentleness with which he spoke. He could hear the years they spent together layered under Dean's words, but had no way to respond. His layers were missing.

Once they had arrived back at the hospital, Cas needed a little more help getting up to the doctor's office, and sat limply in his seat while Dean and the doctor talked.

'He's had three more seizures,' Dean told him, consulting his notebook, 'all under three minutes. So far, only vomited that first time, and he stays unconscious for around five minutes afterwards.'

'How long does the fog last for?'

'It varies. Up to three hours so far, but I think it's affecting his concentration, or something. Forgetting words, where things are, that kind of thing.'

Cas frowned at that. 'I don't think that's true.'

'Cas, you forgot where the bathroom was the other day,' Dean said gently.

'Let's not be too hasty, it could be other things,' the doctor said. 'Are you sleeping well, Cas? Lack of sleep can affect memory and concentration.'

'Actually, I'm not sleeping very much,' Cas said.

'Any ideas on why?'

Cas shrugged. 'Mostly a mix of not being able to get comfortable and bad dreams.'

'Is that new?' the doctor asked Dean.

Dean shook his head. 'He used to take Celexa for that.'

The doctor nodded thoughtfully. 'Right. I think we've got enough here to give a definitive diagnosis of PTE, and I want to start you on some drugs and see if we can't minimize these seizures. I'm afraid we'll have to wait until we've found the right treatment before we can try you on some new anti-anxiety medication. But that's the long term. Do you understand?'

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