Help me

Chapter ten

Daves p.o.v 9 June 2020

Two and a half month had passed since he had left without telling Joel anything. To be honest he hadn't thought so much more about what to do. He had mostly just been laying on his bed not doing anything. Sometimes he had to get out of bed to get some food or go to the toilet but except that he hadn't left the bed. He sometimes played these stupid games where you didn't have to do anything else but click to level up. It was stupid and a waste of time but it kept him occupied so he didn't have to think about what happened. They always came back at some point though and then he had to think about it. Joel had written to him sometimes to try and get in contact him. Dave didn't answer except the first text he had sent. "It's already so long ago... two and a half month" Dave remembers. Dave looked at the SMS for about the thousandth time.

Joel: Are you ok? I did mean what I said last night btw

I'm fine thanks : Dave

Joel: Good, just call when you're ready to talk ok?

ok : Dave

Since that Joel had messaged him a few times to make sure he was still ok. Dave knew he was concerned but he hadn't known what to answer so he hadn't replied. What do say if your friend asks you if you're ok but you're not and you aren't? He didn't wanna worry him. Maybe it wasn't the best plan not to reply but if he was going to worry his friend anyway he might as well not reply right? Dave sighed and turned off his phone. He just didn't have any motivation to do anything. Every movement was a fight as if he was weighed down by heavy stones.

Dave had managed not to break his promise to Joel about not cutting. I've also gotten messages from my family and friends even some fans. If you went to any of my latest videos you could also see a lot of concerned comments asking if I was alright. It was nice to know they cared about me but it also made me feel like I let them down. Then there were the hate comments. I've learnt to live with them but that didn't mean they didn't hurt sometimes. Most of the time they were just frustrating though.

Dave's phone begins to ring the sound very loud in the silent house. He looks down at it and of course, it was Joel. He sighs and closes his eyes "I'll just ignore it then it'll stop eventually". Joel had tried to call him before but given up when Dave didn't answer. After about two hours of calling non stop Joel finally gave up. Dave felt a pang of guilt for not answering his clearly worried friend but pushes it away.

Why couldn't he just have a family that could accept him? His whole life would be so much easier. Then he could love Joel without problems and he wouldn't constantly be depressed. His parents were the reason for every single one of his problems. Except for maybe the birds outside his window that kept him awake with their twittering. They were so annoying and it only made it worse they had made their nest just outside the bedroom window. Thank you birds...

He heard a knock on the door but doesn't answer it. He never does even though people keep coming to try and help him. The door wasn't even locked but everyone always assumed it was and left. It was quite funny actually. Like everyone else, this person left again when he didn't answer. "Wonder who it was," Dave thinks but he doesn't really care. All that mattered was that they left now.

The sky was beginning to darken and you could see the moon if you look that's it. Dave didn't care about the moon or anything else for that matter. The only reason he was relieved was that that meant the birds would shut up. They always shut up when it was night luckily. That meant he could finally sleep and be allowed to forget his problems for a while. Unless you got nightmares then it was better to be awake. Actually maybe not since his life was a living nightmare right now. The only difference was you could wake up from a nightmare but not from life, unfortunately.

Finally, the birds fall asleep and that means Dave can also get some sleep. 

A/N: I know the last 3 chapters are boring as fuck lol

I'll try getting something better out later today