BAD BOY ABUSED (male pov)

#9 Is that what she thinks of me?

Alexs debauchee eyes sobered me up and now I was feeling everything come back to me like a tsunami of emotion and pain. I needed to eat my feelings and tame my munchies so I piled my tray high with just about everything I could managed. I watched as Olivia feasted her eyes over my tray, chicken parmesan pasta, a side salad, bread sticks, two servings of chocolate fudge cake, a handful of blueberries, a vanilla yoghurt and a pack of cheetos. Jade green eyes glowed alight with amusement.

"Munchies" I said as a way of an explanation, she nodded and guided me towards her usual table, sitting beside her friend. I let out a secret sigh that she didn't catch wind of.

I would've preferred sitting with Olivia alone, being around new people makes me nervous. I don't know how they will act around me. The girls usually try it on with me, touching me without my consent. The guys usually pick fights, touching me without my consent. I made the mental decision to ignore her, keep to myself and just eat my food letting Olivia and her friend talk among themselves.

As I sat down in my seat I shot her friend a quick glance, eyeing up and making a judgement on how she will act based on her stance. She had dark skin, dark hair and dark eyes but her manner radiated light, especially towards Olivia. She smiled widely in Olivia's direction and little ringlet curls bounced around her face. I didn't even introduce myself, I tucked into my food straight away, sinking my teeth into my chicken parmesan pasta.

"Anyone give you any trouble today?" Her friend asked.

"Just the usual everyday occurrences, nothing major" Olivia replied through a voice sagged with disappointment. I looked up at her as she rolled her eyes, trying to play down that the shit she goes through doesn't bother her but when you've been playing down your own emotions your whole life you get pretty wise to the tactics fast.

"You put up with this shit every day?" I needed to ask, for my own clarity. There's no point assuming we have this in common if we don't.

"Pretty much, yeah" she said sadly and I felt the guilt cling to my insides.

Shake it off Liam, you're meant to make her hate you.

I swallowed my increasing emotions back down along with three blueberries, ignoring her admission or the gloom in her voice.

"Yeah and she puts up with it from you too dipshit." her friend spoke up, penetrating her dark eyes into my skull. She wasn't wrong but I didn't like to be challenged so I met her glare with one of my own, cold and calculating. Not showing the ounce of regret I felt somewhere deep down inside of me. Not allowing myself to fully let that regret in, Olivia is safer if she hates me.

Blue eyes held captive under her friends scorching gaze until John the chem kid distracted me from across the room. Suddenly his appearance seemed more important than whatever was happening across this table. I needed to catch him before he left.

"Shit... Liv we gotta go."

I gathered up my food, not wanting to waste any because I've felt the importance of food first hand and I waited for Olivia to say goodbye to her friend. My mind rolled over how I was going to do this with Olivia next to me, listening to everything that I said. But I knew I needed to. As we approached John the nerves started peaking in body, worried about what questions she would ask and how I would answer them.

"You got any?" I said with a malevolence tone. I tried to be as obtuse as possible, not wanting to give anything away to Olivia.

I knew he understood what I meant when he glanced nervously at Olivia, uncomfortable that I was letting her know about our arrangement. I was nervous too, I rubbed my hand over the back of my neck thinking for a moment before I offered John a compromise.

"Don't worry about her, I'll keep her quiet." I gave Oliva my best warning glance but inside my stomach was curling over. What if I can't keep her quiet?

Either way I got what I came for. John gingerly handed me a folded paper towel, I didn't even check inside because I trust he's got the goods so I just handed him over the money. The money I had worked hard for at the arcade. I felt Olivia tense with the exchange and I knew she was undisputedly uncomfortable with it.

We stepped away from the cafeteria and I allowed myself to unfold the paper towel placing a chalky white pill on my tongue and swallowing it down with a gulp of water. Olivia said nothing but she watched everything. Her whole body echoed out an ugly feeling of judgement and for some reason I think she was furious with me, I could feel the heat radiating from her body.

"Jesus, what's crawled up your ass?" I couldn't take this scrutiny from her, I felt enough of it for myself.  For once she didn't hold back expressing her feelings.

"You." She huffed with epic annoyance. "You go buy from one of your drug dealers when you know I have no choice but to go with you. You had no right involving me in something I never wanted to be involved in. What if the principal finds out and then tells my parents? Oh God... what if the police find out and send me to jail? Oh my God... my college future will be gone and everyone will think i'm some kind of washed up, low life druggy."

Is that what she thinks of me?

Wow talk about an overreaction. Is that how innocent she really is, freaks out about standing next to me while I swallow down some really strong pain meds? I was a little bit taken aback by her outburst, I've watched people treat her like shit all day and she hasn't stood up for herself once. I must have really pissed her off. I liked that I pissed her off. I couldn't stop a slow smile stretch on my lips and the thrill of pissing her off was crystal clear to see through the glint of my eyes.

"Chill Olive, you're being ridiculous and overthinking things." Her eyes softened at the reflection of my smile and I knew I had won her over yet again. She searched my face trying to read my emotions and I coiled them all back up and locked them inside me, keeping my soulless expression fixated on her.