antics | b.e

chapter 20- regret

JUNIPER

"you know what i fucking said? i fucking said she was just a bitch who wants to go around and messing with peoples feelings. that's all she seems to be good at, sweet talking her way into peoples lives and just ruining them. i should've fucking shot her right in the fucking head when i had the chance. no, you said she was just being nice and look where we are. she isn't so fucking friendly now is she?!", alejandro screamed at the dash board, to no one in particular really. he had lots of pent up anger and when he ranted, most of the things he said he never means.

so juniper didn't have to worry about him actually putting a piece of metal into billie's brain.

hopefully.

"you shouldn't have wasted all that fucking time on a player. a goddamn piece of shit is what she is. i should've known to never bring you to the party when i knew she was there. you're young and so gullible, naive. of course she would go for you, easy prey for that son of a bitch. it's on fucking sight the next time i see her.", he growled out, she raised her head from leaning it on the passenger door and blandly looked over at him.

"last time you said that and did that it didn't end well for you.", he did a double take at her, noticing how mentally beat up she seemed. he coughed, embarrassed she would bring up the situation.

"well, you left me on the floor, i was bleeding out.", she shook her head softly, though it still woke up the headache that was calming down.

"you've been in that position way too many times to count, andro. at that point it was your job to mop up your own blood.", then she fell quiet, numbness taking over, a toxic coping mechanism. the situation finally hitting her, all the times she chose to be ignorant, not wanting to believe billie was talking to somebody else.

her words wrapped themselves around juniper like barbed wire, cutting her the worst way possible and draining her into a pudding billie could mold any way she wanted. the vine that crawled around her limbs every time billie spoke to her, the lies that would form on it like thorns. it stabbed her over and over, she was good at picking up on faux stories and promises.

she wanted to be blind to it, because why would such a lovable and caring soul like billie ever portray herself like that?

that was her mistake along the way, leaving herself to find out what the future held for her, the sickening feeling of being lied to.

sure, juniper was angry, enraged even. her first step towards an actual relationship and it all goes wrong. her chest hurt, nothing was putting the aching to ease, and that pain spread from one organ to another. from limb to limb that subtle twinge coursed through her veins.

billie wouldn't let her stay over a lot, but when she would they would have long talks. about nothing in particular, random things that popped into their minds. watching movies and asking out of the blue questions, curious to see the others answer.

sometimes the sheets smelled of strong perfume or sex, but she ignored the pang in her heart and laughed to whatever the girl she adored the most.

her somber eyes looked up to the sky scraping condo, counting the windows to keep her mind occupied as she walked up to the revolving doors.

"you okay, sis?", an arm wrapped around her neck, startling her as she almost forget he existed and was right next to her. his arm squeezed reassuring her he was there for her.

she nodded glumly, any word muttered to her was muted, a faint chirp in the back of her mind. her head did all the talking when she was like this, it was a self-preservation method her body sadly shifted to when it felt like it was going into overdrive.