My Fortunate Event (Klaus Baudelaire x Reader)

The End...

♪Look away, look away♪
♪Look away, look away♪
♪This show will wreck your evening , your whole life, and your day♪
♪Every single episode is nothing but dismay♪
♪So, look away♪
♪Look away, look away♪

♪The Barunum and the Baudelaires, adrift at sea, wash up far off the map♪♪Olaf's right behind them with a fungus and a trap♪♪Our story ends in tragedy upon a coastal shelf♪♪I beg of you, I beg of you, stop reading, save yourself♪

♪Just look away,♪
♪Look away—♪
♪There's nothing but horror and inconvenience on the way♪
♪Ask any stable person, "Should I watch?" and they will say:♪
♪Look away♪
♪Look away, look away♪
♪Look away, look away♪
♪Look away, look away♪
♪Look away, look away♪

Lemony Snicket's POV (at Old Ed's Soda Shop)

You may have noticed in your life that it is easier to get used to happiness than despair.
The 13th time you drink a root beer float, you may enjoy it less than the first time because you have become used to the taste of vanilla ice cream and root beer mixed together. However...the 13th time you discover somebody is following you, your despair is much greater than the first time because you've been on the run for many years and you're exhausted.

*stands up and starts walking out of the soda shop*

My name is Lemony Snicket. I have been on the run for many years, and I am exhausted. I was once a member of a secret organization, along with my friends, my siblings, and the woman I loved. Now all of those people and the organization are gone, and I spend my days drinking root beer floats alone as I trace the sad, soggy case of the Barnum and Baudelaire orphans. But now the case has dried up. I cannot find where the Barnums and the Baudelaires went when they sailed away from that burning hotel so many years ago, nor do I know what's become of them since.

All that I do know is that in this story...there are no happy endings, and in that respect...I fear that the Baudelaire orphans and I are in the same boat.

Y/N's POV

The two elder Baudelaires and I took turns rowing. Right now is was Violet and Klaus's turn and I was stuck listening to Count Olaf rant. 
"I've triumphed! I've burned down the Hotel Denouement, destroyed V.F.D. once and for all, and I have two sets of orphans finally in my clutches! At last, their fortune and their diamonds are mine!" Count Olaf exclaimed.
"So you keep telling us," Klaus sighed as he continued to row.
"The first thing I'll buy is a new car. Something with a big engine so I can drive faster than the speed limit and ram into other cars unsuspected. Orphans, head to the nearest car dealership!" Count Olaf demanded. I sighed and face-palmed.
"We can't head anywhere. The wind has died, and we're exhausted from rowing," Violet replied as both her and Klaus stopped rowing. 
"Laziness is no excuse. You orphans are the worst henchpeople I ever acquired," Count Olaf complained. 
"We're not your henchpeople!" I exclaimed, frustradedly.
"What is there to eat around here?" Count Olaf asked. 
"Nuts!" Sunny replied, holding up a can of nuts. 
"How dare you call me that!" Count Olaf exclaimed, knocking the can of nuts out of Sunny's hand and causing it to fall into the water. Well...there goes our food supply. Speaking of which, I'm starving. I haven't eaten since the Chicken soup last night...or was it the night before?
"I think you're forgetting who the captain is. If you don't do exactly as I say, I will break open this diving helmet, and then, oh, you'll be sorry," Count Olaf growled. 
"So will you. If you release the Medusoid Mycelium, we'll all be poisoned," said Violet.
"We're in the same boat," Klaus said in agreement. 
"You think you're so clever. Ever since you were orphaned, all you've done is complained. Well, while you were being whiny and useless, I have come up with a plan. We don't have to just be stuck here in the middle of the ocean on the Carmelita II, because I..." Count Olaf trailed as he made it to the other end of the boat. "...am going to change its name to the Olaf!" he said with a chuckle. The Baudelaires, Charlie and I looked at each other. 
"I read those tidal charts on the Queequeg. I bet I can chart a course back to the city," said Klaus softly so Count Olaf couldn't hear. 
"I can create a compass. All I need is a piece of magnetized metal and a pivot," said Violet in the same tone. 
"What do we do about Count Olaf?" I asked. 
"Push," Charlie suggested.
"We may not have a navigational compass, Charlie, but we still have a moral compass," I said. 
"Yeah, we can't just push a person overboard," Klaus said in agreement to my statement. 
"Not even Count Olaf? As long as he's around, nobody's safe," said Violet.
"It's a terrible thing to do. Even to a terrible person," Klaus replied.
"What choice do we have?" Violet asked. 
Just then, Violet, Klaus and I started to slowly creep towards Count Olaf. But, before we could do anything, Count Olaf turned around and the three of us sat back down. 
"Hmm. Well...Well, well, well. It looks like the tide has turned and a storm is brewing," Count Olaf said in a stern and uneasy tone. "I meant that figuratively," he said, gesturing us to look behind us. 
We looked behind us and a very strong and harsh looking storm started to catch up to us and the sound of thunder boomed. 
"He meant that literally," Klaus said in a panicked tone as a huge wave came towards us. My first action was to grab Charlie and protect him as much I could before everything turned black...