ALWAYS

XIV

It’s maybe already two and a half hours that have passed since she left… Jungkook still locked himself in his office… still trying to bury himself busily at his
work… but cant help not to listen outside… maybe waiting for a car to arrive…

The papers that he has been holding since the last couple of hours were still glued on his hands… can’t really focus on his work for his mind is clearly filled with still the thoughts of her… the night that they shared… him hearing his name from her lips… totally made him went nuts…

The tray on the coffee table was now empty… his head slowly laying on his desk… tired from too much thinking… and slowly… his eyes went heavy… and as soon as his eyes closed… her face greeted him in his reverie.

--

He immediately stirred from his sleep as he heard the door opened… he pulled his head up from his desk… stretching his arms and rubbing his eyes with his hand…

The door’s open… but no one came in… his brow raised a bit… until he heard some small footsteps slowly coming to him…

He glanced to the side of his desk… peeking where the sound is coming from… that’s why he didn’t see someone coming in…

A little girl with pink chubby cheeks… wearing a pink small dress and a red ribbon tied on a fistful of her hair… standing in front of him… smiling…

Both of his eyebrows were now connecting… wondering if he’s still dreaming… he rubbed his eyes once again but still the little girl’s standing in front of him… she somehow looked familiar… until he realized that the little girl looked a like his wife… same porcelain skin… pink lips and dark long hair… seemed a small version of her.

He stood up… went slowly to the girl… his head bowed down for the little girl is just about as tall as the height of his knees… concluded that maybe the little girl is just 3-4 yrs old…

“Who are you…?”

He simply asked the little girl… her big round eyes twinkled as she looked up to him… her smile never left her lips which made Jungkook’s brow raised once again.

“What are you doing here…? Where are your parents…?”

He sounded cold but the little girl didn’t notice it… it’s his first time dealing with a kid… so he doesn’t know how to address and how to act in front of one…

And just then he heard someone outside the room… his gaze went from the little girl towards the door.

“Soojin-ah… baby where are you…?”

It’s Rosé’s voice… his glance went back to the little girl with nothing but still a sweet smile on its face.

He saw Rosé passed by the room and quickly went back when she saw the little girl… her face looked so worried as she quickly marched inside the room… totally ignored his presence.

“Oh… God… There you are baby… I’ve been looking for you for minutes… your –“

Rosé scooped her up in her arms and suddenly cut herself from speaking more as she realized what room she’s at…

She stiffened as she realized Jungkook’s standing and watching them… she slowly turned to him and bowed a bit with the girl in her arms.

“I’m sorry Jungkook… did she bothered you…? I’m really sorry…”

She bowed while the little girl has her arms snaked around her neck and still looking at the man standing in front of them.

“Who is she…?”

He ignored her apologies… as curiosity about the little girl hit him. “Ah… she’s Soojin… my niece…”
She said to him… he looked at the little girl with still a blank expression… they

really looked the same… “Omma… who is he…?”
The little girl finally spoke… her tiny cute voice broke the slowly starting silence between them…

And quickly Jungkook wondered once again… Omma…? He thought… the little girl just called his wife ‘Omma’…

“Oh… Soojin-ah… He’s uncle Jungkook…”

He saw his wife smiled sweetly at the little girl… Soojin looked at him and flashed him a sweet smile once again… he suddenly felt warm inside his chest… seeing the little girl somehow made him feel calm.

“Omma… is uncle Jungkook… friend of appa…?”

Appa… she’s definitely talking about her dad… to think that the child’s considering his wife as her mom… made him a bit uneasy…

“Yes baby…”

Rosé pinched the little girl’s cheek which made the girl giggle… the two looked really like a mother and child… which made his chest felt a little heavy… he just found himself standing there… watching the two while trying to understand what he’s feeling inside.

“Baby… we better go… we shouldn’t bother uncle Jungkook… your appa is also looking for you…”

She told the girl before turning back to Jungkook.

“Jungkook… sorry for bothering you… she really is a fast runner and likes to hide that I didn’t catch her before she went here…”

She unconsciously chuckled which made his insides jumped a bit… it’s his first time hearing it from her… and upon realizing what she just did, her cheeks warmed and blushed… she quickly bowed and was about to make her way out but the little girl clutched on her hair a bit to stop her.

“Baby… what is it…?”

Soojin pouted and turned to Jungkook…

“Omma... Soojin wants to play with uncle Jungkook…”

Rosé’s eyes widen and immediately felt nervous… afraid that Jungkook will punish her later for bothering his work.

“Baby… uncle Jungkook’s busy… appa and I will just play with you neh…?”

She tried to convince the little girl but Soojin continuously pouted… too stubborn to let it go… totally got her attitude from her biological mom.

She looked at the girl helplessly and turned to Jungkook… while the man can’t help but to admire inside him the cuteness of the little girl… he turned to Rosé and saw that she’s having a hard time convincing the kid… he sighed and reached for the girl’s cheek.

“I’ll go out later and play with you arasso…”

Pinched Soojin’s cheek which brought back her smile again “I’ll just finish some things here first…”
He said to Rosé… she nodded and finally her face calmed… “Thank you…”
She whispered… he just snubbed her by turning his back and went back to his desk… he heard the door closed and turned to it and gave off another sigh.

‘What am I getting myself to…’

He thought as once again brushing his hair with his hand

--

“Soojin never saw her mom personally but only through her pictures… Rosé and I were both glad that despite her young age she already understood that Rosé isn’t her mom… but still she calls her omma since she never saw anyone as her mom other than Rosé and my wife… I’m so grateful of her that she wholeheartedly treated my daughter as if she’s her own…”

Mingyu said to Jungkook once they had a chance talking with each other… both seated at the bench outside… watching Soojin and Rosé played at the garden…

As soon as Jungkook went out of the room, Soojin immediately ran up to him and quickly reached both of her hands for him to carry her… Rosé looked at him shyly… her face painted apologies on it…

It’s his first time carrying a kid… the little girl seemed as if she doesn’t care if she doesn’t know the man well… and somehow… deep inside him… he find something soft towards the little girl… they played a bit… carrying her on his shoulder pretending that they’re flying… totally forgot himself once again… something new to him yet really enjoyed.

Rosé found herself watching the two… her heart fluttered seeing him having a good time with her niece… those delicate smile that he showed… warmed her heart… how she wished he could also smile like that towards her…

Then their eyes locked once again… can’t help but to smile a bit at him… which made his heart skipped once again… thinking if she really did that simple gesture to him… he stiffened… put a halt on playing… and slowly brought the kid down from  his shoulder… thinking that he’s now having an illusion of her smile… which in  reality really happened.

And now… seeing her smiling once again… having a sweet moment with her niece… seeing her how she cared for the little girl as she’s really her own… brought back the skip on his heart…

As far as he knows, Tzuyu doesn’t like kids just like he is… they never talked about having a family of their own… but why seeing Rosé with Soojin somehow changed his perspective about having children…

“You’re so lucky to have her… I’m sure your future kids will be the luckiest with her having their mom… she never missed any moment of Soojin’s growth… not like me…”

Mingyu chuckled before continuing

“She’s more worried than I am whenever my daughter gets sick… she would even skip her class just to look after her… I really am a failure without her…”

And that put Jungkook into thinking again… ‘a failure without her…’

‘What does he mean by that…?’

‘Does he know that he’s talking with his sister-in-law’s husband…?’

Series of thoughts trailed inside his mind… and as if Mingyu read it… he quickly justified his statement.

“I mean back then… but now I am really working my best to be a great father for my daughter… it’s not as if Rosé would always be there for us right…?”

He saw Mingyu smiled as he looked at his wife… followed his gaze to see Rosé’s beauty once again… her smile that added u to her beauty… having the time of her life with her niece.

While he’s still drown in his thoughts… Mingyu made his way towards the two girls… joining their happy time… the two tickled Rosé together until she crashed down the grass… her continuous chuckling brought back Jungkook from his thoughts.

He turned to the three… the skipped from his heart stopped… brought back the pain once again… how could the three looked like a family… complete with a mom and dad… and a baby that looked like her…

There he saw once again how Mingyu looked at his wife… saw how he could make her smile… he could read it all… Mingyu really has something special for his wife… and too bad it would never be able to let out from his system… and once again… apart from the pain he’s feeling… a bitter smile crept into his lips.

He stood up… leaving the three to have their bonding time… just this time he would let her have it… going back to his office and locking himself once again… away from the pain… and the happiness that he almost felt watching her in her own happiness…

--

Soojin fell asleep… cradling her in her arms… she made her way towards their room… settling the little girl and tucked her to bed… Mingyu needed to go… he has an appointment he needed to attend to… Rosé agreed to let Soojin stay in their house for her grandparents were also busy…

She watched the little girl as she sleeps… caressing her little chubby cheeks and smiled to herself… she really wanted to have an adorable daughter like her…

And then she remembered her husband… knew that he went back to his office… she wanted to thank him again… sparing his time just to play with her niece is something really big for her.

She went to his office once again… slowly opened the door and found him reading again.

“Oppa already went off… he was in a hurry that’s why he didn’t get to say goodbye… he said thank you for accommodating him… and I just let Soojin to spend some days here since she doesn’t have someone to take care of her… I hope you won’t mind…”

She said with her head bowed a bit… biting her lower lip while her husband looked at her…

“And… uhmm… thanks for spending your time with Soojin… she really likes you...
I’m sorry if she’s a bit stubborn…”

She said… he slowly stood up from his seat…. Leaving the papers down on his desk… Walked towards her… she stiffened as soon as he stood beside her.

“I’m going out…”

He coldly said glancing a bit at her… she already knows what he meant… she just continuously bowed her head as he completely passed by her… as she heard the door closed she felt like she would break down… why does it feel painful thinking he would go to his lover…? She thought while clutching on her chest.

--

He closed his eyes… trying to focus on her lips… wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her closer to him… he moved his lips… wanting to deepen their kiss… but as soon as he felt her opening her mouth… Rosé’s face flashed in his mind…

He pulled out… pushing the girl a bit away from him… “Oppa… what’s wrong…?”
Tzuyu asked him as she leaned to him and planted soft kisses along his jaw… his hand left her waist… as he slumped his back on her bed… putting his arm above his forehead… he sighed… totally ignored the girl before him.

She noticed his different self… pulled her head from his jaw and looked down on him… he’s mind is really flying off somewhere which made her a bit annoyed.

She reached for his buttons… slowly stripped him out of his clothes but suddenly he stopped her before she could completely unbutton his shirt.

“Why oppa… what’s wrong…?”

She asked him… he just hold her hand to stop her. “Not tonight…”
He said coldly… first time for her to hear him sound like that… she got curious as to what’s happening to him so she asked him once again.

“Just… I’m not in the mood… I’m sorry…”

He answered… she can’t help but to feel uneasy… she leaned down again… resting her head on his chest and wrapping her arms around his waist.

“Oppa… if something’s bothering you… just tell me okay… I’m worried about you…”

She said… he looked down to see her head… hugged her tight and caressed her hair… how could he be thinking of another girl when the one he loves is right here in front of him… and just then he thought of something.

“Tzuyu-ah… what do you think of having a family of our own…?”

He blurted out… which made her sat up and looked at him with a bit of horror on her face… he saw her eyes looked at the side and her lips slightly twitched… indicating she doesn’t want to talk about those things… back then he would find her expression cute… but now he can’t make himself to… She then after a while forced out a smile…

“Oppa… what’s with the sudden topic…? I thought you don’t even like kids…”

She said… he somehow felt a little disappointed… remembered how Rosé smiled towards the kid that she doesn’t even own…

“Nothing…”

The girl smiled and went back laying her head on his chest… while he stared outside her window…first time of anticipating for the night with his lover to end.

--

He went back to the mansion in the middle of the night… can’t make himself sleep on his lover’s house… just realizing himself of going back… leaving his lover alone deep in her sleep… and now finding himself standing outside their room…

He slowly opened the room… the lamp beside their bedside table is still opened… while she’s now asleep… she left it opened for something inside of her kept on telling that he’ll be back… waiting for him until she fell asleep… and just like her feeling… here he is now standing at their door watching her sleeping form from afar.

He walked towards their bed only to find another figure beside her… his heart then began to skip once again… seeing the little replica of his wife… both sleeping peacefully as the little girl safely secured in her arms…

Somehow wondering if he would have a family… would this image in front of him would always welcome him once he got home…? Seeing two of his beautiful girls waiting for his arrival…? How it made his heart feel heavy again for maybe he will never experience such dream…

He turned the lamp off as he made his way to the couch… resting himself on it… hugging himself to sleep… pretending he didn’t think and hoped for those things to happen… reminding himself to put stop on his once again foolishness.