Little Shelby Girl

Part 5. My father

Vive POV

There he goes. into the ground, my brother Finn. This has been the first week since birth that we have not spent together. We were always together, two complete different personalities, but he was, he is a part of me.

I am standing next to Tommy, holding on to his hand. Aunt Polly stands behind us, crying in silence. Ada's also here like the rest of my brothers.

I'm freezing, it's fucking cold this time of the year. The coldness suits the ambiance of the funeral though. This morning, it was the first time in six days since the whole family came together. Aunt Polly still hasn't said a word to Tommy. John and Arthur don't say much either. When Ada came back home she yelled at all of us, told us this family is cursed. Don't know what I had to do with that, but honestly, I think she's right. We're a cursed family, but in some way I feel that's what's makes us strong.

After an hour it was aunt Pol who first left the funeral and headed back home. Not giving any of us a glance, not saying a word. Tommy turns around and gestures to the rest of the family to follow her. He sighs, letting go of my hand to light his cigarette. I see him staring at the sky, closing his eyes for a moment before he starts following us. Ada leaves on her own and goes the other direction.

We all make our way back to the house in silence. I fasten my pace a little and walk up to John. As he walks with his hands in his pockets and his head is bend, his eyes are focussed on the street. I arrive next to him and put my arm through his without saying a word. The past days he hasn't said a word and I have no idea where his thoughts are.

He looks at me with a sad smile. "You alright?" he asks. I nod.

"Love you John." I let out. Unsure why I said it so randomly, but also not knowing what else to tell him that will make him feel better. I feel like my brothers are even more chattered about the whole situation than I am. The difference between me and them is that they know they have blame over this. They feel guilt for the death of their little brother. If I were in their place, I don't think I could live with that thought. Seeing them 'weak' makes me scared. I need them back the way they were. Together as a team.

He smiles to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

Ten minutes later we finally arrive at the house. As I walk down the hallway making my way to the living room, my heart drops.

There he sits, with his fucking joker face, his mustache and mean grin. Our father. I automatically take a step backwards clashing myself at Tommy who was walking right behind me.

"Oi, watch where you going" He says almost tripping over me. By the look on my face, he knows I'm startled by something and he walks into the room to see what's going on. Aunt Pol leans against the kitchen counter with a cup of tea in her hands. She doesn't really seem to be bothered by my fathers visit. Tommy walks into the room first and I wait till the rest of my brothers are inside as well before I dare to follow.

A deadly silence follows. Tommy is just standing in the middle, glaring at our father in pure disbelief.

"Get out." He says after a few seconds in a soft but demanding tone.

I try to hide myself behind Johns back, not wanting to show my face. He turns his head around with confusing, not understanding what I am doing and why I'm clenching myself onto him.

Arthur, leans against the doorframe and points his finger to the backdoor.

"You heard 'em, there's the fucking door". He says.

My father now finally moves himself and stands up from his chair. "Well, well, well... you boys didn't felt the need to inform me about the death of my own son? Didn't felt the need to invite me to his funeral?"