Little Shelby Girl

Part 6. Acceptance

Vive's POV

It's been four weeks since the funeral of Finn. This week I went to school again. After three weeks being at home, grieving together, a little piece has returned in the family. Sadness still falls over me at random times, especially in the night. Hours of the Wolf Polly calls it. She has it too. I think me missing Finn will last forever and part of me hopes it does.

Everyone's back working and the best thing is that everyone is working together again. It took Aunt Pol I think three anger tantrums towards Tommy before she finally accepted that her being mad at Tommy is not gonna bring Finn back. She now speaks to Tommy again even though I don't think she can forgive him. I don't think any of us can, but we have to move on.

Ever since the war with the Lee's, Tommy has taken a break from everything illegal he was working on. Sometimes, I try to overhear their conversations during family meetings. I used to do this with Finn because we always had to wait outside. Now I listen with my ear to the door by myself. I heard Tommy tell them the focus of business is now on fixing races. I don't know much about this, but it sounds legal... I think? This weekend they all left to the races. Some important man named Billy Kimber will be there.

I am at home with aunt Pol. This afternoon I want to go to Charlie and help him with the horses. Tommy says he's thinking about buying me horse so I can learn how to ride. I've always had a love for horses, thinks it runs in the family.

"Polly, I am going to Charlie okay?" I yell upstairs.

"Wait!" I hear her running downstairs quickly.

"Let me give you a look. When will you be back?" She says while handing me my coat. "Before dinner I think around the same time as the boys". She nods. "Yea, I think they'll be back right before dinner and otherwise we eat together right?" I nod and kiss her goodbye.

Ever since Finn, she's much more involved in everything I do. She wants to know everything, where I'm going, who I'm hanging out with. She's more protective than ever, which feels kind of nice, but sometimes a bit controlling.

Last week I turned 13. It was the first time celebrating my birthday without Finn. We didn't do much because as you might understand, my birthday came wrapped in a big, black, sad bow.

We ate cake, I got some presents and we moved on with our day. It was fine, I wasn't in any sort of party modus myself. At school my class sung for me. I was standing on my table, watching everyone sing and clapping their hand. All I thought was please stop.