Chenzel; Breaking Point

Empty And Hollow

 A/N

I dont know if many people read this. If you guys just dont like this or it gets boring, or yo just simply have lost interest, tell me. Because i would much rather stop writing bc people dont like it, than write it for people who just dont care. Sorry, im not in the best of moods at the moment. Its ugg, i dont know what to say. Im just sad again. Enjoy this chapter. Bc its really sad.

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She tried to stand up, but she kept caving into her stomach at the thought of what she was doing, what she was about to do. How this was going to take the feelings of hatred in her head go away. Forever. No going back now.  She picked up the razor which was still in its plastic case, her hands were shaking. She never thought she would get this low, this unhappy that this seemed the ONLY option. The brunette could not contain her tears, she had to let it all go, because she had held this inside of her for so long.

 This was it she thought to herself; finally I’m going to be happy.

She took a good look it it, she couldnt see much with the tears that were pouring from her eyes. But she made sure she took a long hard look at this piece of metal, because it made everything she was about to do, seem very real indead. She looked at the way it shined, glisened, it was so... beautiful, in a way. She knew she sounded mental, but its strange how one piece of metal, could cause such happiness.  Idina stood up ever so slowely; the shower was still on. If people think killing themselfs is the easy option, how wrong they are. This is the hardest thing ever.

The brunete dropped the razor onto the floor. She needed the blade out preperly. Her consentration for this task had to be on fleek. She managed to control her breathing and crying.  The brunette then  stamped onto the razor to get the blade out of its plastic shell. It had came out perfectly, and she had managd to keep the blade from cutting her foot. She shrew the plastic shell onto the floor and went back to the floor of the shower. But soon enough the tears came back. She was uncontrollable crying and her whole body was starting to shake. Could she do it? Was she ready?

“Oh god, I’m ready”

She said to herself, she could barely get the words out. Idinas crying was getting louder and louder, but she didn’t care, she was caught up in the moment. She was getting what she had longed for this whole time. For the first time, she could admit she felt completely alone. She had no one left, she tried to stay alive for Kristin, and the people she worked for, her fans, who for some reason liked her; but then that just ammounted to the pressure of being perfect. Which she never could be.

 Idina put the blade to her wrist; she couldn’t even see what she was doing as her eyes were flooded with tears. She didnt know what she was doing, in her hole life, she never pictured this was how it was going to end. She felt like everything was in slow motion, she could feel the water splash of her, her hair which was wet and fell just below her shoulders. She felt the emptiness in her chest, that she had felt for so long, she felt the hatred for herself and people wanting her to kill herself,  she heard the little voice in her head screaming dont do it, this voice was Kristin. Idina felt the coldness of the shiny silver blade that she was holding against her wrist. She felt everything.

Idina froze and she couldn’t move, she stayed in the same position, and she was crying like there was no tomorrow. Because in here case, there wasn’t going to be.  She wished someone would save her from herself. She wished for someone to fix her, for someone too... care. But if Idina didnt care if she was to die, then how was anyone else going to?

 A/N

There is more to come! You guys want the rest of it? Want to find out what happens to Idina, what happens to Kristin?

You just tell me you want more, then you got it. I just want to know you guys actully like this.